I’m leaving tomorrow for vacation, so, you know, see ya! Maybe I’ll post. Maybe I won’t. That kind of depends on if the Sabres do anything if I see Joe Biden, who is apparently vacationing in South Carolina as well.
There’s not much going on. Teppo retired, my mom cried, and then I reminded her that hopefully he’ll return to us as an assistant coach.
There’s lots of drama surrounding the Olympic training camps, but I think everyone just needs to get over it. Leave the players alone, let them play in Vancouver, then discuss the things you need to discuss.
I have to go pack. I used to love packing, then I realized how bad I was at it, and now I hate it.
Have fun while I’m gone, Buffalo.
I was really happy when I saw Teppo got nominated – because coming back from open heart surgery to play when you’re 40 years old is quite an accomplishment – but let’s be honest. Richard Zednik had his artery sliced open and almost died. He has this award locked up, and I really don’t have a problem with that. (Although Brian Pothier’s story is pretty heart-warming too…)
I just thought you should know that all day I have been going up to people and reminding them that the Funnest Week of Hockey Ever starts tonight. The Sabres are in Atlanta to play the outrageously frustrating Thrashers tonight, they face my beloved Caps on Friday, and then Sunday afternoon the Caps and Thrashers play each other. I have told you this before, but I’m saying it again. I have also said before that if I was a true, diehard Thrashers fan (but does that species even exist?) I would be so effing mad at this team. They sucked royally for the first three or four months before turning it up. Thrashers, there is absolutely no point in losing the first thirty games of the season and then winning five straight. That does nothing but screw over your chances of getting the first pick. Either be good for the entire season, or be bad.
And please don’t trade Ilya to LA. I could handle a trade to Montreal, because then he’d be in our division, but do not trade him to LA. I will never see him again if you do, and that would make me very sad.
My friend’s dad is going to be on Jeopardy Friday night but we’re DVRing it so I can watch the Caps. I decided if for some odd reason the Sabres should lose (5-3) tonight I’ll have to root for the Caps because at that point the Sabres’ season will be over and the Caps need to take advantage of New Jersey’s current skid; but if Buffalo squeaks out a win I’ll cheer for them. To start.
I entered to win tickets to the Washington/Atlanta game Sunday but didn’t. I’m a little upset.
Trendy Euro is backing up Miller because poor Lala has some sort of hip ailment. Frostee’s Mom is very excited.
While I’m definitely (and inexplicably) attached to Trendy Euro, I find myself not feeling the same way about Harvard. I’m sorry. He just seems to be like a lot of the other Sabres: completely ineffectual. I know he’s been taking faceoffs and killing penalties and bringing grit to the lineup, but I’m kind of sick of seeing that. My apologies, Mr. Harvard, but in my humble opinion you don’t seem to be worth $3 million.
I just broke the news to my friend that Petey is a UFA this summer. It did not go over too well. I love Petey, but if the Sabres sign him before they sign Caveman we are going to have some serious problems.
Well. I did not foresee this happening. Sure, I always thought he was a total hottie and adorable and funny and talented and his bromance with Brooks Laich is awesome, but on a team that already has Alex and Chris Clark and Nick Backstrom and Bruce, I never really thought I could fit another player. He just always fell under that “Love for the Washington Capitals” umbrella. I didn’t think I would, like, fall in love with him.
But you know what? Mike Green is so talented and a great player and, apparently, an excellent hamburger maker. (Guacamole? Brilliant! I LOVE guacamole. I am definitely trying that next time.) I thoroughly enjoy watching him play and get quite excited when he scores. He leads all defensemen in goals and points, you know. I wish the Sabres had a Mike Green.
That’s a stack of good stuff right there.
Speaking of defensemen, Teppo is back! We need one of our veterans back.
Frostee: Oh, Mom, Teppo is back tonight.
Frostee’s Mom: He is? Oh, good! I was thinking about him this morning. I get so worried about him. So he’s okay now? [holds hand over heart]
Frostee [feeling slightly awkward]: Uh…yeah. He should be fine.
It’s one thing when I ramble extensively about my love for various players to my mother, but when she starts talking about Precious Teppo it gets a bit odd. How am I supposed to feel about her love for him? Should I refer to him as Papa Teppo?
I’m going to miss part of tonight’s game because my friend’s sledding party goes until 8:30. Every year for as long as I can remember my one friend invites approximately 40 kids to Chestnut Ridge to go sledding. We all run around and eat pizza and scream and act like 2 year-olds. It’s quite fun. Tomorrow I won’t be able to move because sledding on ice HURTS (although I’m thinking I’ll just bring a guy on the sled with me to cushion my fall, because apparently bulky snowsuits are back in?) but we don’t have school so we can all heal.
I just thought you should know that I will not tolerate any of that,”Well, we just got back from a long road trip and we’re tired and jet-lagged” shit. I expect two points from you tonight. Got it?
Dear Ottawa Senators,
So, how’s that new coach working out for you? What? Shutout? At home? Heh. Enjoy the offseason.
Scene: Frostee and Frostee’s Dad are sitting in the kitchen.
Frostee’s Dad: That was Helene [our neighbor, who also got an exchange student] on the phone. Apparently their girl isn’t talking either.
Frostee: We weren’t expecting them to be fluent English speakers, but, you know, at the meeting last week they told us that the kids were competent at conversational English.
Frostee’s Dad: Liars.
Frostee: I feel bad for him! He can’t even communicate with us. He has no idea what we’re saying to him. When I asked him if he had seen American football before he said no, but when you asked the exact same thing ten minutes later he said yes. It’s kind of sad. They should have at least warned us they don’t understand English.
Frostee’s Dad: Well, we’ll just have to take baby steps. We’ll start small, with “I hate Ottawa.”
Frostee: Yeah. Then we’ll move on to “Alex Ovechkin is much better than that wuss Sidney Crosby because at least Alex can throw a check.”
Frostee’s Dad: Exactly.
I hate Willis McGahee, Dear Readers. I hate him a lot. I think he’s a moron, and apparently he can’t even string together a coherent sentence. That doesn’t mean I chuckled with glee when he went down last night. That’s scary. I hope he makes a full recovery.
I hope Teppo makes a full recovery, too, although it doesn’t sound like he’ll be back any time soon. Poor, poor Teppo! (Dear Teppo, If you see a woman running at you this weekend to kiss where you got hit by the puck, just go along with it. She’s harmless, I swear. With Love, Frostee)
Apparently the Caps are on at two. That means I’ll have to get all my studying done before that. When am I going to have time to watch the episode of “The Office” that I DVRed?
Apparently Ryan Miller – as well as most other athletes out there – enjoys taking lots of naps. What would we do without his witty commentary on the lives of athletes?
That’s Brind’Amor’s plus/minus. He is a -28. It’s the worst in the league. I’m kind of amused by that.
Solid effort last night by the Sabres. Ryan got himself a Ryan Miller Shutout. Thomas got two assists, and Timmy scored two goals. I’m quite proud of him. The past few days I’ve been wincing whenever anyone skates near him. This was a huge game, and the one tomorrow night in Florida is just as big. The Panthers are only two points behind the Sabres, so it’s the same situation as last night. (I doubt I’ll be able to watch all of the game, though, because I have to DVR The Secret Life and watch Gossip Girl. But I really don’t know why I watch The Secret Life. I think it’s because it’s so bad it’s almost funny to watch?) Florida USED to be the butt of all my jokes, but then they got good, so now it’s Tampa Bay and Pittsburgh.
Teppo is out with a facial injury…my mom is devastated. She absolutely adores Teppo, and I must say, it’s much better than two years ago when she loved Thomas Vanek. That got…a little awkward. The bad part is that Patches is coming back in Since Weber is hurt. Guys, I was at the game against New Jersey, and I can say as an eye-witness that Nathan Paetsch looked absolutely horrendous. This is not good.
The Capitals beat the Bruins in regulation. Ha! Take THAT, Boston! Great goals by Green and Semin. Alex didn’t get any points, so he’s still two behind Sid. He did, however, have his jersey untucked at the beginning of the third period. It was kind of odd. Jose looked pretty solid after Semin scored to lock up the win, but I’m kind of liking the rumors that the Wild should trade Nick Backstrom to Washington. Not only would there be TWO Nick Backstroms on ONE TEAM, but that would turn Washington into an absolute beast. Even more than they are now.
Our Chinese house guest arrived last night. I don’t think he knows any English words other than “yes.” When I introduced myself that’s what he said. Apparently he told my mom his English isn’t very good. He’s still up in his room, which probably isn’t the best idea for his jet leg. Since Twihard and I are incredibly politically correct, we were texting last night about mutually assured destruction and nuclear warfare. During the third period I received this little gem from her: “chinese government want look at this fanatical fan. why she love russia so much?”
Heh. Maybe I was the only one who found that funny.
Dear Readers, you wouldn’t happen to know where one could find current graphs and data tables involving the Asian economy, would you?
I feel as though I have neglected them a bit over the past few days, so now I’m going to talk about the Sabres, and the Sabres only. (I thought it would be a good idea to get myself in a foul mood before going to watch “The Deer Hunter” for my school project.)
- Nobody told me last night that Pkaleta was going to miss at least three more weeks! Nooo!!! We were just saying during the second period last night that the Sabres could use Patty K back in the lineup. We need his spunk and hits.
We need PK back in the lineup and healthy. Stat.
- I just got around to watching the post-game interviews. Thomas Vanek’s was okay; he was definitely right when he said the Sabres play better when he plays better. It was nice seeing Ryan Miller talk about how he needs to step it up (’cause, um, Crunchy? You kind of sucked last night), and I enjoyed when he starting getting on the media’s case about quotes of his. Heh. Paul Gaustad’s interview was so good that I actually watched it twice. Paul was angry and he was embarrassed and he thought that the effort was “unacceptable.” Hear, hear, Paul! He was right when he said that it’s everyone’s job to hit, not just his. He looked quite pissed. I hope he kicked everyone’s ass after the media left. I don’t know what to do with Jason Pominville. I used to love his adorableness and innocence. Now I kind of want to throw him off the roof. I couldn’t even read his blog without gagging. Seriously, Jason? YOU NEED TO STEP IT UP. YOU NEED TO START SCORING. Maybe we need to tell him that if he scores lots of goals the unicorns will come back?!?! ANYTHING at this point. I can’t believe I wanted him to be captain this year. My new vote for captain is Mr. Gaustad. He’s one of the only players who actually seems to care about winning. He’d make a much better captain than Rivet.
- Times must be bad when even the penalty kill is sucky. I couldn’t believe the Sabres let the Caps score TWICE with a man-advantage. (Although the Backstrom goal, which was right in front of us, was actually a very, very nice goal. I wish the Sabres could score goals like that)
- I’m looking forward to seeing who Lindy scratches. I want Jochen scratched, definitely. I feel almost blasphemous saying it, but Pommer could use a night off too. Staffy could probably sit again, and maybe even (I’m sorry Cari!) Derek. And Jaro. And Teppo. And Hank. For the first 59 minutes last night I would have said Clarke too, but since he scored I guess he’ll stay. Maybe Lindy should just bring up the rest of the Portland Pirates and have them play a night. It might knock some sense into the Sabres.
- The power play needs some serious work. I don’t know what, but Darcy and Lindy need to do something. They need to get someone good to quarterback the PP. They need someone on the point who can actually keep the puck in. They need to stop passing the puck around and just shoot. Look at the Caps’ power play. All they do is shoot. You know, someone should tell the Sabres that one of the reasons Alex is currently the second highest scorer in the league is that he always SHOOTS THE PUCK. If Pommer shot more, I bet he could score. If Jochen and Derek shot more, I bet they could too. I hate bringing up that obnoxiously cheesy quote of Wayne Gretzky’s, but the guy knew what he was talking about when he said that you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. IT’S TRUE, SABRES. WHEN YOU DON’T SHOOT THE PUCK, THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN SCORE.
- I really do believe that the Sabres have some talented players, but someone needs to teach them to start acting like it. Remember last year? Derek was pretty darn good last year. Even Pommer looked pretty good out there. Is it all mental with them? Is there some sort of block in their brain keeping them from playing well? We need to hire some sort of psychologist to get in their heads and figure out what the hell is wrong with them.
- I didn’t pay much attention to the Sabres during warmup last night, and while we all know one of the reasons, there’s another. I noticed it in November, and I noticed it again last night. The Capitals look good even when they’re warming up. The drills they do, and the passing, and the puck-handling. All of it. They look like a good team out there before the game even starts. (One player in particular was absolutely mesmerizing with the puck before the puck even dropped, but I won’t mention him. This post is supposed to be about how much the Sabres suck.)
- And is it just me, or are all of the Sabres incredibly slow skaters? Good grief. It looked like they were trying to navigate through molasses at some times last night.
- Adam Mair scored the first goal for the Sabres last night. It was actually a really nice goal. The thing is, Adam Mair shouldn’t be the one scoring that kind of goal. Thomas Vanek should. Roy should. Pommer should. When Adam Mair, Matt Ellis, and Paul Gaustad are out against Ovechkin, Backstrom, and Kozlov, there is something wrong.
- At this point in the season, I don’t think the Sabres will make the playoffs. If they do, it’ll be a last minute eighth seed, which would (most likely) mean Boston, which would most likely be very embarrassing.
Well, that’s all I have to complain about for now. Have a happy and safe New Year’s Eve, everyone, and we’ll see you tomorrow for The Stupid Fucking Ice Bowl, Take Two!
Today in math, quite a few of the kids were wearing Sabres gear (including myself) in honor of the start of training camp, and my teacher jokingly asked one kid if he wanted to buy a Drury jersey. Naturally, the boy recoiled in disgust, and Mr. Senn promised that he was just joking. He then went on to say, and I quote, “Nah, I’m just going to take off the three and put on a nine and turn it into a Pominville jersey.” I know. My married, male, football coach math teacher is planning on wearing a Pominville jersey to games. WTF?
When I opened up the depth chart today online, I realized that I don’t pay one bit of attention to defenders on the ice, unless his name is Toni Lydman and he sucks. Therefore, this analysis is not going to be very good, and I promise that I will pay more attention this year. (This might be because I haven’t seen Sabres hockey since freaking MARCH. That is TOO LONG)
Last season was: AWESOME when he faked out Marty, but otherwise a bit frustrating.
This season should be: solid defense.
I will admit, I can not get too mad at Henrik after the shootout against New Jersey. Honestly, I haven’t seen anything quite as badassed as that in a very long time. But he needs to learn how to defend the freaking goalie the rest of the time. I vaguely remember being mad at him for not doing that.
Last season was: ….. (how the fuck am I supposed to do that? I can not remember ANYTHING from last season other than hating losing. Not making the playoffs is not good for me. Jaro, tell me, what did you do last year? I remember you scoring the first goal of the season, but I also remember the Sabres losing that game. WHAT DID YOU DO?!!?)
This season should be: solid defense.
Just…don’t leave Crunchy alone. I get that he sucked out loud most of the time last season, but sometimes it was because YOU and YOUR FELLOW DEFENDERS were not doing their JOB.
Last season was: sucky.
This season should be: solid defense. (see a theme?)
Toni Lydman does not know how to play defense. I lost all faith in him last year, and he better be AMAZING in the first game this year, because that’s all I’m giving him. Three periods to prove me wrong.
Last season was: spent in San Jose.
This season should be: solid defense, and veteran leadership.
I tacked on the veteran leadership for him because that’s supposedly why we got him. God knows we need some more on-ice leadership. We also need some solid defense. Craig, you better DELIVER.
Last season was: ehh
This season should be: I’m not really sure.
Nathan Paetsch is another one of those guys I don’t really care about. I also know that if Mike Weber was to replace him on the roster then he would have to clear waivers before he could go to Rochester Portland, and everyone keeps talking about how we can’t risk that, but are they serious? Because, from what I can remember, (fuck you, Sabres, for not making the playoffs. I have enough to remember without having to remember how NATHAN PAETSCH, of all people, played last year), losing him doesn’t seem like it would be SUCH a travesty. But maybe that’s just my opinion.
Last season was: totally awesome.
This season should be: totally awesome.
After showing just how awesome he is during the end of last season, Andrej Sekera is most definitely feeling the love. I have complete confidence in him. I’m not worried at all.
Last season was: also pretty awesome.
This season should be: pretty awesome.
Time to tell you all a secret: I actually don’t really care all that much if Nathan Paetsch gets snatched up on waivers (because he’s such a hot commodity), if it means that Mike Weber makes the roster. I LOVE Mike Weber. In spite of his awkward interviews, I still think he is the shiz. And that peanut heaven comment only made me love him more. (Since The Buffalo News is RETARDED, they don’t have archives going back that far. Maybe they didn’t want evidence of that EMBARRASSING loss to Montreal [it’s actually the one that forced us to put Little Ryan on the deck]. Or maybe they just don’t want easy access to archives. I bet it was Bucky’s idea.)
Um, why is Teppo Numminen not on the depth chart? Hmm???
Teppo Numminen (take THAT, sexy depth chart)
Last season was: spent with his chest cracked open.
This season should be: all Teppo, all the time!
I love Teppo Numminen just as much as I love Mike Weber. He’s old, but he’s a foxy type of old, like Harrison Ford. When he almost cries, it’s hilarious and endearing at the same time. (quite unlike when Ovie cries, because then I usually fall out of my chair due to my hysterics) Now that he’s all healthy, he can be more of that solid defense and veteran leadership we need. He’ll also probably give Pommer a run for his money in the captain competition.
So, I mentioned in the title of the post how Ryan Miller will probably lose an arm. I actually have a perfectly logical explanation for that. You see, my dad and I were talking earlier about the upcoming season (just like in Crunchy’s house, my dad is the hockey expert here. The only difference is that I don’t call my dad by some cutesie name. I just call him Dad). I pointed out that this will be a massively confusing season for Sabres fans. We have no players who need heart surgery. All our key players are under contract. What will we do without contract situations to stress about? Who will we talk about if no one needs a heart valve replaced?! We have NOTHING to distract us from hockey. What the HELL are we supposed to do? I’m a relatively young fan, and I’ve always had to worry in the offseason. Two years ago it was the whores formally known as Drury and Briere, last year it was Teppo and the whore formally known as Soupy, and even Crunchy! (at least, I was worried about Crunchy. I don’t know about anyone else). EVERYTHING has been going swimmingly thus far, and therefore something very bad is going to happen very soon. My money is on Crunchy losing an arm, Royzie having a majorly bad hairday, and Pommer breaking his neck. Nothing this good can last.
This is the fifteenth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will get to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
My day pretty much sucked, so I am going to pretend it didn’t happen. I will say this, however: the Islanders have a better chance of winning the Stanley Cup this year than I have of posting every day. I had 27 minute classes today because of assemblies and I still had an hour of homework. I’m still aiming to name Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend over the weekend, but for now, another cut:
You may think I am a cold, cold girl for cutting Teppo Numminen, but actually, it is the opposite. I love Teppo. He’s attractive, he’s a sexy veteran, and the whole heart valve-replacement thing made me want to care for him. I am cutting Teppo Numminen because I know that while he would graciously accept being named Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend, deep down in that healing heart of his, he would know he could never truly love me. I am not cutting Teppo Numminen, rather setting him free; he may now be free to try and woo Corinne, and good friend of mine. While she sees him as old and stupid, he loves her with a passion not seen often. I am cutting him so that he may do whatever he feels he must to make her love him back. I could never hold back a man who feels such pure love to someone I care about. Being the hopeless romantic I am, I find his devotion amazing.
I wish you the best of luck, Teppo. I know that someday Corinne will realize just how lucky she would be to have you.
BTW, I finally got a Facebook yesterday, and I just invited Nathan Gerbe to be my friend. I know you are all jealous of how cool I am.
Warm fuzzies to Teppo Numminen, for signing a new contract! We definitely need him around, and this should make choosing the new captian quite interesting.
I would like to point out that a lot of people were saying that he wouldn’t sign a new contract with Buffalo after they suspended him last year, but those people were wrong. Ha.
In the spring of ’07, I went on a People to People trip to Washington, D.C. (this was before I loved the Caps) I became very close friends with one of my roommates, and I’m really excited because, as part of their vacation, they are stopping at Niagara Falls. As you know, the Falls are very close to Buffalo. Duh.
Emily is really nice, and adorable when she watches hockey. Twice during our stay in D.C. I had to take over the TV to watch the Sabres crush the Islanders (remember when the Sabres used to play playoff games, and win? *sigh*), and every time someone got checked she would wince. It was really cute.
My mom was giving her dad directions on the phone to our house yesterday night, and he asked how to get to Ralph Wilson Stadium. My mom cautioned him that he probably wouldn’t be able to get in. He said that was fine, he just wanted to see it.
Well, then. None of us like the Bills all that much (it’s actually kind of a guilt thing that makes us watch them. We feel like we have to), so we were a bit surprised. They live near Penn State, so why would they want to see where the Bills play?
My grandparents were over when he called, and since they have both lived in Buffalo for more than eighty years, we started talking about all the sports places in Buffalo we could take them to. I have compiled this list after our discussion, so in case there is ever a visiting sports fan, he or she knows where to go.
- Ralph Wilson Stadium, home of the Bills and the first ever Winter Classic.
- Tim Russert Highway. Go Bills!
- The house two streets over from here, where a Bills player used to live. (we don’t remember who it was)
- The house one street over, where the Milarkys used to live. If we are lucky, the new owners will let us inside to see the weird decorating Mrs. Milarky did. (Painted wood paneling? Huh?)
- The house one street over in the other direction, where I babysit. It is the home of WBEN’s own Susan Rose, who is a huge Bills and Sabres fan. (And yes, I have been on the radio, but not for sports. Being the rad geek I am, I talked about Harry Potter last summer. Oh yeah, I did.)
- HSBC Arena, home of the Sabres and Bandits. Let’s go Buffalo!
- Dunn Tire Park, home of the Bisons.
- One of the Bills Personnel books we have, so we can show the people the picture of my dad from when he worked for the Bills.
- The townhouse down the street from my grandparents, where Ralph Wilson himself lives.
- A picture of the van we used to have. Ralph Wilson once told my grandfather it was a very nice van.
- St Franny’s, where Patrick Kaleta used to play.
- South Buffalo, because I don’t know the exact location of the house Patrick Kane grew up in.
- The Wegmen’s on Sheridan Drive. If you go there during the regular season, you can see Teppo Numminen and his (supposedly gorgeous) wife or Jason Pominville (who is rumored to look about 15 years old off the ice) shopping in the best grocery store on the planet.
- The house down the street from one of my dad’s co-workers, where the Brieres used to live.
- The house up the street from my dad’s same co-worker, where the Dumonts used to live.
- The Adam’s Mark Hotel, where traveling hockey teams stay.
- Craig Burn Golf Club, where many Sabres (and ex-Sabres and other hockey players) belong. You can chat with Michael Peca at the salad bar, observe the Birons enjoying fish fries, share a rain tent with Larry Quinn, hit balls on the driving range with Curtis Brown, and hang out in the pro shop with Todd Marchant. (Actually, I will be skipping school in mid-September to sneak out to the course with my dad on the day of the Sabres Golf Tournament.)
- My room, where you could find more pictures or magazines or newspaper articles or bobbleheads relating to hockey than you would ever see elsewhere in your life.