Dear Readers, I am safely back at the kitchen desk, happily tapping away on the laptop once again. My trip was very enjoyable, but like always, it’s good to be home.
We started off our vacation visiting friends in Rhode Island, but other than seeing a few Lucic shirts and getting a nice tan, nothing remarkable happened there.
On Wednesday we headed to Boston. I won’t go into major details, but suffice to say we saw everything historical in the whole city, stood over Paul Revere’s grave, ate seafood, saw all the big colleges, and went to a Red Sox game at Fenway Park. Oh, and I saw BJ Novak walking down the street and I fell in love with Nick Green, Red Sox playah.
I’m not a huge baseball fan so I don’t really feel as though I can comment on the game. It was definitely exciting, and I can’t say for sure but I don’t recall hearing too many baseball games ending 1-0. Our seats were far out but we could see the diamond, and the guys sitting in front of us were heavy duty Bostonians and absolutely terrifying.
Time for pictures!!
This is Paul Reveah’s house.
This is the view of TD Banknorth Garden from the top of Bunkah Hill.
This is Fenway Pahk. The Bahston Red Sox play heah.
During the seventh inning, the Red Sox faithful got a nice, loud “Yankees suck!” chant going. It was hilarious.
This is my new boyfriend Nick Green at bat. He struck out this time. Sob.
These are my beloved Nick Green’s career statistics versus Kansas City. I’m, um, not quite sure if I should be in awe of them or disgusted by them. I understand how baseball is played, but I don’t understand the specifics and different statistics. I’m just going to assume these are mindblowing because it makes dear Nicholas even more lovable.
Now, are you ready for the best part? I saved the best picture for last!!
The tall ships were in Boston this week (it was a complete coincidence that they were there when we were), and guess whose ship I saw on Friday?
A whole mess of things happened in the past week and I’m not going to rehash them all, since I’m sure you heard about it already. Just a few things:
- The Caps got a second-line center!! At least, they got someone to compete for the spot. This is exciting.
- The Sabres signed some defenseman who spent last season in Sweden. I was less than impressed by his statistics. I hope he’s just here to fill roster space in Portland.
- Chicago was a complete mess and then they quickly signed all their RFAs. There is an excellent chance they completely implode next summer when it comes time to sign all the RFAs.
- Kovalev signed with Ottawa. That must suck for Montreal fans.
- Jay McKee SOLD OUT and signed with Pittsburgh. I’m sure you’ve heard me tell this story a hundred times, but Jay McKee signed an autograph especially for me right before he left Buffalo in which he said he’s my friend. Clearly he was lying, because no friend of mine would sign with Pittsburgh.
- Alexander was named some sort of ambassador for the 2014 Winter Games in Sochi. This could get awkward if Gary decides to pull the plug on NHL players at the Olympics.
- Trendy Euro (the original one) signed with Rangers. This is heartbreaking news.
- Lindy Ruff has no problem standing pat. That really upsets me. Lindy, I don’t care if your team only finished two points out of the playoffs this year, and I don’t care if deep down, we all know a huge part of that was Ryan Miller’s injury. A non-playoff team is a non-playoff team no matter how close you get, and I think the players we have don’t cut it. If you don’t feel that way, it makes me sad.
And now, to spend the night playing with my new iPhone. I don’t know if anyone’s told you, but these things are pieces of art. I’m in love with mine. I don’t know how I functioned before I got it.
So, last night the Sabres lost. They were leading with 3.5 seconds left, and I don’t care if you’re playing the best team in the history of hockey. When you have 3.5 seconds left on the clock and you’re leading, you should win. Especially if Max scored an actual goal. (I know I tweeted about this during the game, but it still blows my mind. I did not know he knew how to score with his stick. I thought he could only score when he’s trying to jump out of the way and deflects the puck in.) I didn’t think the Sabres would win, but when there were 3.5 seconds left I kind of hoped they would. Jason Pominville, you are terrible. I suspected it after I was at the Washington game. Then I watched games at home for two months and became quite sure that you suck. Then I was at the Anaheim game and realized just how awful you are. When my mom came home from the Florida game on Thursday the very first thing she told me was, “Pominville is SO BAD at hockey!” I want Lindy to bench him and put Ellis back in the lineup, but I doubt that is going to happen.
I love Lala and he’s definitely got a lot of great qualities, but he needs to work on rebound control.
When Pie scored I threw up my hands in excitement so quickly I almost knocked a lamp over. I love the man child. I don’t care how bad he plays, if they traded him I would have been heart-broken.
Shootouts make me miss Al.
Even though I’ve accepted that the Sabres will miss the playoffs for the second season in a row and I’m cool with it, I still felt the need for a little Youtube therapy this morning. I have become increasingly aware over the last few weeks that Nicklas Backstrom is incredible. In fact, my whole family seems to have some odd fixation with him. My brother, who doesn’t really like hockey, seems to like him. My mother, who enjoys getting on my case when I profess my love for players with thick accents, said nothing during his interview last night. At the Caps game in December, my father told me I should stop loving Alex and start loving him. My dog stopped barking long enough to watch him last night. Since I was feeling the Nick Backstrom love this morning, I searched him on Youtube. I was rewarded.
There’s the video of them Segwaying around D.C., and if you haven’t already seen that one your life is a little bit empty. It’s classic, especially at the end where Mike Green Segways into an urn. Nick is featured in that one when he complains he’s cold, even though he’s from Sweden and shouldn’t be cold in D.C. weather. “Ladies’ Man” never gets old, because you get to see all the players ragging on Brooks Laich and Alex is hilarious at the end. I never realized in all the other times I watched it, however, that Nick is incredibly innocent when they ask him who is the biggest ladies’ man. I bet he doesn’t even know what a ladies’ man is. He informs the camera that it is Brooks Laich, because “he is a good man for a woman.” Let’s all say it together now, “awwww!!!!!”
But I’ve already seen all of these. I was looking for something new to watch, and that’s when I found these:
First, I think it’s a great idea to have European players teach fans how to speak in their native tongue. I always thought that would be really cool and I wish the Sabres would do something like that.
Second, I wish you could have watched me watch these videos. I alternately covered my face and laughed hysterically the entire time. I can’t explain it. Look at him! Even when he’s dissing them he’s either doing it with a smile on his face or seems stiff and unused to being to being mean to people! He’s adorable! He’s lovable! He’s wonderful and amazing!! Look at him shake his head hopelessly!!!
Nicklas Backstrom has officially entered the race to be Frostee’s Second Favorite Cap. This is so annoying.
Oh, and you’re all invited to root for the Caps in the playoffs. The more, the merrier!
I had a really big test this morning. It was first period, so it wasn’t even like I would have other classes to study during. Since these tests are wicked hard, I completely isolated myself from hockey last night. I wanted to watch the Capitals, or even the Pens/Panthers game, but Kublai Khan and his concubines called me.
I was quite distraught that Alex wasn’t playing but thought the Caps could still break the losing streak without him, so when I turned on the TV with about ten minutes left in the third to check the score, I was QUITE surprised to see Toronto winning 2-0. Then they showed Mama Ovechkin, and let me tell you all something, Dear Readers: If looks could kill, the entire Washington Capitals team would be pushing daisies right now. It was kind of hilarious.
I did not see Alex sitting next to her, however, and while I’m just guessing here it might be because I doubt anyone would want to sit next to a person with that facial expression. Capitals, you better get your act together before Mama goes apeshit on your asses.
Speaking of Alex, there are so many things that are right in an interview that should be so wrong. His shirt looks like the same material as my brother’s crib decorations when he was a baby and his hair is just sticking up. PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO THE HAIR. Honestly, I just stared at it. Someone should have just reached over and smoothed it down. Good grief.
I am glad to hear that while the Russian Machine is currently broken, no amount of breaking could keep him from the playoffs.
I think it shows how dedicated we are that even when we were about to take an uber-hard test, my friend Kristen, who sits in front of me, leans back and frantically whispers, “Moore might not be able to play because of visa problems!!!” I hope they get those straightened out. It would kind of be an epic fail if he couldn’t play tonight because of that.
I was just starting to get over the Kotalik trade and then TBN just HAD to write an article about how surprised he was. Was that ENTIRELY necessary, TBN?
I really don’t understand why I took this trade so hard. I always liked Al but I never liked him that much.
Buffalo is still three points out of eighth place. They need to pick up the two points tonight in any way they can, and if they don’t beat Ottawa tomorrow it is completely over. They also better hope the Caps beat the Pens on Sunday because if Pittsburgh gains any more ground it’s over for Buffalo.
I hate watching the standings.
I feel sad. I feel very sad. You might even say I’m depressed, and it’s been getting worse and worse all afternoon.
Sure, the Sabres are winning. Royzie had two goals and my beloved cavemen Jaro scored. Thomas is in front of the net and looks hilarious in all his headgear. But something’s missing, Dear Readers. Ales Kotalik is not in the lineup.
You know how they say you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone? Well, that’s true. I always liked Al. I loved him in the shootouts and he was even my Trendy Euro Sabre. Then, all of a sudden, he was gone to Edmonton for nothing more than a draft pick that ended up going to Toronto for Dominic Moore (I think. All the draft picks have me confused.) When I said I wanted the Sabres to dump dead weight, I didn’t mean Trendy European dead weight! Especially the type that is completely badass in the shootout. Ales Kotalik is gone and I worry that I never told him how much I love and appreciate him while he was here.
Maybe the Sabres will lift my spirits. Maybe they won’t. I don’t want to jinx anything with half a game still to be played. The only thing I do know is that if the Sabres should be faced with a shootout in the near future, I worry about the outcome.
Cheerio, Ales Kotalik. We’ll miss you. Who will be my Trendy Euro Sabre now?
(Updates at bottom!)
I carry a backpack to school. It’s a Vera Bradley one and has owls on it and I like it very much. The only problem with this bag is that I can’t easily keep it on my lap and text in school. Now, I normally don’t text in school anyway, but today I made an exception. So, while risking life and limb, I repeatedly checked my phone today, each time holding my breath as I waited for the big deal, aaaaaaannnnnnnndddddd……..
Not much happened from the Sabres’ point of view. Yes, re-signing Timmy was huge. He may be a walking, talking STD, but he’s still a hell of a hockey player when he’s healthy. Therein lies the problem, however. Timmy’s a great guy to have on your team when he’s healthy. The length of the deal – 2 years – makes sense when you take his injury history into account, but the amount is crazy. $9 million? What happened to a hometown discount? That’s $4.5 a year. I started to realize as the day progressed that if Timmy got traded I would be sad, but I’m still not sure about the amount. It just seems like an awful lot for a guy who can’t be counted on to play a full season.
The only trade the Sabres made was sending a 4th round pick to Phoenix for Mikael Tellqvist. My first reaction was to freak out when I saw they got a goalie (because when you’ve got your head stuck in your bag thirty seconds before the bell rings and the teacher is standing right in front of you the only thing you’re thinking about is to not get caught) but once I straightened up I figured this just means Enroth’s going back to Portland. This also might just mean that Ryan Miller is out for the season. *sniffles*
I’m not going to go through each and every deal that was made because other places have already done it well. One thing I did notice, however, was that Calgary seemed to be pretty active. They certainly seem to want to go deep in the playoffs this year. The Chris Neil to Florida deal is pretty interesting too (if it actually happens. Now Ottawa’s denying it?) because the Panthers don’t exactly have a player to fill that type of role. I’m not yet sure if I’ll miss having him up in Ottawa to hate.
There might be a few more deals coming through that were made just before the deadline, but it looks like the Trade Deadline has passed. It doesn’t seem to be as crazy as last year’s. I specifically remember my jaw dropping at several of the deals, most notably the Huet to Washington and the Hossa to Pittsburgh (and I hope Hossa’s okay. I may not like him but I never like seeing players getting taken off the ice on stretchers. Ouch.) and, of course, the Soupy deal. I even remember exactly where I was when I heard about the deal. I was taking a test on the American Revolution when one teacher came in and told my teacher that Soupy was gone for a player that was “Thomas Vanek with an attitude.” I loved Big Bear, but I’m not sure if I would call him Vanek with ‘tude.
So the craziness of Deadline Day has passed. The Sabres got another backup goalie and signed Timmy but didn’t really do anything about all the dead weight on this roster. It’s almost a bit anti-climactic that after all our speculation the Sabres only dumped a draft pick. I REALLY wanted to say goodbye to Max today.
And now the Sabres play the Canadiens tonight. I’m kind of scared.
P.S. I’m NOT thinking about Alex limping off the ice.
UPDATE: It would appear as though the Sabres just acquired Dominic Moore. Huh. Interesting.
UPDATE #2: The Sabres sent Kotalik to Edmonton. I am surprisingly devastated about this. Who’s going to be my Trendy Euro Sabre now?
- Royzie! scoring in the shootout. And Al. You know what, Darcy? Keep Al. Get rid of Timmy and Max, but keep Al.
- Having a three point cushion. It may not be a four point cushion, but it’s better than being tied. With Florida.
- Thomas! scoring. Dude, it was ABOUT TIME. Happy birthday!
- Ryan! being awesome and amazing. See, Dear Readers? That is why he is my favorite Sabre. Because he rocks.
- Alex! for scoring two power play goals, including the game winner, the latter of which came moments after I swore never to speak to him again if they lost the game due to his moronic penalty. Clearly, Alex can’t stand the thought of me not talking to him ever again.
- Watching the inauguration in school. America, it’s very, very cool that we inaugurated our first African American president today. Go us.
- Peyton getting Keith’s ring. That’s the way it should be.
- The Sabres being kind of good again. It’s nice. I think I like it.
I’ll be honest with you, Dear Readers. About halfway through the second period last night, I slipped into that mindset I usually enter when I’ve realized that the Sabres are going to lose. I usually continue to watch the game, but I might start texting a few more people, or get a magazine to flip through. I enter that mindset when I see the Sabres have decided to not show up. Last night, the only Sabre who showed up was Ryan Miller. I was especially disappointed last night, because I realized my open confidence in the team had done nothing and I would have to go back to tough love. When Roy scored, the sensible part of my brain told myself that the goal only meant that the Sabres wouldn’t get shut out. There was a part of me, however, that refused to believe that. A tiny part of me was thinking that maybe, just maybe, the Sabres could pull off a win.
Heh. I was right!
It wasn’t pretty near the end. It went into overtime, and it became clear that it would go into a shootout, and then I freaked out because the Rangers are beasts in the shootout. Al was the only one to score for the Sabres and Miller stopped the first two, but when Chris Drury came out I knew it was over. Ryan was right when he said in his post-game interview that Drury has “a flair for the dramatic.” I even vowed to throw our Rock Band drum set at the TV if Drury scored. If Ryan hadn’t stopped him, my brother would have murdered me.
Now, last night and again in Bucky’s column today they were talking about how poetic it is that the guy who decided to stay in Buffalo managed to stop they guy who decided to leave. It certainly was poetic justice in that regard, but it was also poetic for another reason for me. Dear Readers, if Chris Drury was still a Sabre, I can almost guarantee he would have been named Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend. It’s a good thing Ryan stopped him, because otherwise things would have gotten awkward.
- No offense to Steve Valiquette or anything, but it kind of looked like he was having some trouble controlling the puck. He kept dropping his stick and just flopping on it. I really would have liked it if the Sabres actually got shots on goal in the first period, because I have a feeling that if they tested him they might have actually scored a few goals.
- I wasn’t all that impressed by Tim Connolly last night. I know it was his first game back, but a lot of people I had heard yesterday seemed to think Timmy would just take the ice and win the game for the team. Maybe it was because we were all too busy making Tim Connolly jokes to notice his good plays. I’m just surprised he didn’t fall apart when he ran into the net.
- Thomas Vanek must have heard me complaining a few days ago that he needs to start assisting on goals too, because he seems to have been getting quite a few assists lately. Nice job, Thomas.
- I have an inexplicable love for Scott Gomez. I don’t know why, and I don’t know how. It’s just there.
- I really liked Derek Roy’s goal. He just tucked it in between the legs.
- I don’t want to talk about the Capitals game. (Although I’m definitely up for talking about how adorably dejected they all looked when they showed the bench at the end. Alex had his helmet pushed back – why do they do that? It looks so stupid! – and Nick Backstrom and Semin were sitting a few inches down on the bench with their backs against each other. They looked positively heart-broken.) I have a theory about why they lost. I think it’s because Alex shaved. Everyone keeps telling me that he had shaved before the Philly game on Tuesday, but since I was busy trying to convince my grandmother on the phone that I’m not a groupie, I didn’t notice. I get that it was time for his monthly shave and all, but still. That scruff was lucky. He shaved away the luck.
- Apparently Stamkos was a healthy scratch? Heh. That’s kind of funny.
- Ales Kotalik is really good in shootouts. He’s really, really good. I like him in shootouts.
- It was really, really nice to see Ryan win that game tonight. He was a BEAST.
- Detroit tonight. Will Ryan be starting again? He’s been on fire lately, but what if he starts getting tired? It has been a very long time since Lalime started. Wasn’t it back in Washington?
Um, I really don’t like afternoon hockey games. They really bug me. I like hockey games on nights when I don’t have school the next day. I like curling up on the coach in my pajamas, not sitting at the desk trying to do homework and crane my neck at the TV at the same time.
Ah, Kevin Sylvester. How I have missed you. The pregame show is on, and I am loving the messy-haired Crunchy interview. I have this weird love of players with messy, sweaty, post-game hair. I find it adorable.
Lalime is getting his start this afternoon. I’m not sure if I should be worried or not. He was pretty solid in the preseason. I’m also not sure if I want Rick to play or not. I wouldn’t mind getting Mr. Back-up if it meant getting to see Ricky without his helmet. They don’t call him Pretty Ricky for nothing.
Okay, time to work on my Robert Mugabe research. I’ll update with thoughts at each intermission. Let’s Go Buffalo!!!
Hmm, sounds like Lindy doesn’t like afternoon games either. That’s pretty cool.
So is spaghetti for breakfast! Jealous!
P.S. Clare, thank you so much for the picture! I LOVE it!!! Reader Award to you!
First Period 1-0, Sabres
(These are basically my thoughts on the period as it was happening. There is NOTHING on Mugabe’s thoughts on African tribes online)
- Whoa, Jochen Hecht! You badass. Sabres score on the man advantage! 1-0.
- Geez, Mike. And just when I thought Hilary had made you go soft. Leave our boyz alone. (I think it’s hilarious that Mike Comrie was the highest scorer on the Islanders last year)
- Ugh. Just when I thought the Sabres’ power play was getting better, they don’t score in another four minute man advantage. Nice job, Boyz.
End of period thoughts: Lalime has looked solid from all the way back here in the kitchen, and it hasn’t sounded like the Sabres have been doing anything too bone-headed. Time to register for Survey Savvy, then we can start the next period!
Guys, there wasn’t anything uber-important in that Darcy Regier interview, was there? I was too busy eating a banana to listen.
Second Period 5-0 Sabres
- Ehmagod I totally love Adam Mair!!! 2-0, Sabres!!! (McDonald, that was absolutely terrible)
- You know what? Screw working on my book project. Word is being a retard (or, as Gena likes to put it, a “fucktard”) and the project isn’t even due until the 27th. I’m just going to watch some good ol’ hockey.
- Dear Readers, I don’t know about you, but I think Patrick Lalime has been looking very trustworthy thus far. Wouldn’t it be so nice if we all didn’t have to freak out about our back-up this year?
- Whatevs, Al. Just take a penalty. At least I get to see “Kaltsy” now! (I’ve decided that I like Pkaleta on the PK. It’s almost as nice as Ovie on the PK)
- 15 shorties, Islanders? Wow. You guys really do suck.
- THOMAS VANEK PUTS A SHORTIE HOME! WOOO!!! 3-0, SABRES!!! The verdict is in, Dear Readers: Frostee is starting to develop a soft spot for Thomas Vanek. What the hell is up with this?
- POPULATION OF POMINVILLE HAS MOVED UP AGAIN!! POMMERDOODLING!!!!!! 4-0 Sabres!
- Yet another reason why I love Pkaleta. Did you see that body slam?!?! And Craig Rivet, I do not appreciate your attempts at making me love you.
- Adam Mair, you are an OUTRAGEOUS BADASS.
- EEE now Teppo is being all sexy and captain-y as he fills in for Rivet. And I feel so bad for Petey! He was stuck on the bench when the fight started! (My dad is at work and texted me to find out what happened in the fight and he asked “Omg! Wheres Petey?”)
- Um, who is the blood from? Because that’s really gross. I hope the B-lo Boyz are okay!!!
- What the HELL. I am totally in love with Thomas Vanek. This is so annoying. Thomas, if you score more goals that Ovie this year, you die. 5-0 Sabres!!!
- I just missed the last two minutes of play because I was discussing meeting Ovie with my dad. He thinks Dr. Bisson won’t be able to get me in to meet the Capitals, since it’s the Capitals. I told him to ask if I could meet the Sabres, and then I could go into the Capitals room and pretend I was dyslexic/illiterate. Because sometimes I think I am dyslexic/illiterate.
- Mairsy is back! And yes, I did just reenact the Kaleta body slam for my dad. This will be so much easier when we have DVR.
- Um, why is Thompson going to the dressing room? I’m really confused. Maybe I should stop messing around on Facebook and just watch the game.
- Spacek’s in the sin bin. Delay of game penalties are lame.
- Gosh darn it, Pommer. I wanted you to score there!!! (Wouldn’t two shorties be so awesomely kickass?)
- Fuck. Did I just hear that Paille is hurt? Fuck.
- Wait, I’m confused. Do the Islanders want to lose?
- Good grief. Mike Comrie, what are we going to do with you? *shakes head*
- Wait, Paille appears to be okay. He’s sitting up on the bench and everything. Phew.
- Dammit, Thomas! Why are you making me love you so much!!
- And now we are treated to “sensitive” Al Kotalik. Awww.
Third Period. Final score: 7-1 Sabres.
But first, a few more thoughts from the intermission report:
- Did Kevin Sylvester just say that Adam Mair has an upper body injury? Because, you know, that’s not very good.
- Craig Rivet might not play on Wednesday?!!? The Rangers are undefeated! We need Rivet!! No!!!
Okay, third period stuff now:
- Ehmagod Crunchy just walked by!! He’s got his skull cap on!! Yay!!!
- My sudden squealing problem is even more concerning than my new-found love of Thomas Vanek.
- Whoa, Harry. She’s probably young enough to be your daughter.
- My brother just asked why it says that it’s the second period. Geez. Get it right, guys.
- WOOO!!! Kotalik sends it home on the 5-on-3! 6-0 Sabres!!
- Whoa, Tony Romo is out for four weeks with a broken pinkie! Ahahaha. He has a broken pinkie.
- Ah, fudge. I was hoping for a Lalime shutout. But the Islanders and their fans don’t actually think that the Islanders are going to make some miracle comeback and win now, do they?
- Al’s in the sin bin? Why?
- And Vanek’s going for goaltender interference? You know what is the most concerning about all this? I don’t feel a burning desire to cut of Thomas’s head for taking a penalty. I just want to hug him and tell him that it’s okay. I do not like this, Dear Readers. I do not like this one bit.
- GOAL!!! That was a GORGEOUS play, Clarke. Gorgeous. And it’s good to see that Paille is okay!! 7-1 Sabres.
- Oh my God, they’re playing the Spongebob theme song. I’m not gonna lie, that’s totally awesome.
- Petey just got a roughing, but so did some Isle. Oh, Petey.
- I’m starting to remember how much I loved the music they play at Nassau Coliseum. Now they’re playing “Welcome to the Black Parade”
- Is it just me, or has this game gotten slightly boring? There are only three minutes left and there appears to be a lot of skating up and down the ice.
- Oh, no, wait, Mair just got slashed. I guess he doesn’t have an upper body injury, then!
- What the HELL is up with the Islander’s mascot? It’s like some sort of dragon or something.
- 146 penalty minutes, eh? Good. I kind of like hockey fights. Not stupid, “we don’t really know how to fight so we’re just going to hug each other for a really long time” fights, but real, sticking up for your teammates, tough guy fights. And fights with the Pkaleta Body Slam.
- OMG I LOVE “What I’ve Done”!!! Can the Sabres play all of their games in Nassau Coliseum? Because not only will they win, we will get to hear awesome music.
- Who are the Islanders kidding? They’re gonna win the first draft pick in June. You heard it here first.
- EEE Crunchy!!! Happy Crunchy!!
- Seriously, Kevin? “It was probably harder than it looked?” This is probably one of the easiest wins I’ve ever seen.
- Dear Readers, I love Lindy Ruff. He is the awesomest coach. I can’t believe this is the first post filed in my new “Lindy Ruff” category.
- Is it just me, or did Lalime look like Crunchy in that first shot of him? that kind of spooky. Speaking of guys that look like Crunchy, we decided that Ryan Gosling kind of looks like a wonky brow-less him.
- Ehmagod, I love Patrick Lalime. He’s adorable and well-spoken.
- Shit I was just thinking dreamily of Patrick Lalime and missed who they said might be out with an injury. Who is it?? I’m panicking!!
I’m just going to have to find out who’s hurt later. Now I have to go shower so that after my lesson is over I can watch the Caps!!
That was an awesome game, I’m not going to lie. If the Sabres beat the Rangers on Wednesday, I think I will go crazy.
I can’t believe they’re undefeated!! *squeals more*
Hecht is hurt? Hecht?!?! No!!!!! Yo-yo!!
While I love each and every one of my dear readers equally, one particular reader went above and beyond the call of duty yesterday, and she is going to be recognized for that now. Twihard and I have actually known each other for a while; she was even one of the people I was IMing when I started this little project. While Twihard is a wonderful, wonderful girl, she doesn’t know that much about hockey. That didn’t stop her from sitting down in front of her computer last night and reading every single post from July up until yesterday. That takes some serious dedication, so for that, I present Twihard with the first ever Reader Award! Woo! *clapclapclap*
And of course, Twi, you will be always welcome in the Latin Lovers club. You should even be made an officer, since Mrs. Curran still doesn’t know your name. But she doesn’t know my name either. Or Camille’s. Or Damien’s.
I find myself in a strange situation, Dear Readers. I rode the bus home today because I didn’t have any after school activities, and then when I got home I sat around for an hour reading my new issue of Seventeen Magazine. Then I leisurely did my French homework and half of my review packet, glanced over my notes for the quiz tomorrow, and filled out the parent schedule for Open House on Thursday. Then I was done. I had no other hoomework to do. at four o’clock on a Tuesday afternoon I was done with all of my homework. I could not believe it. I went on the computer, as I am wont to do after I finish my homework, but I was confused, as I usually don’t have time to just waste away on the World Wide Web until after dinner. I checked up on all my must-reads, and added a new one to the list. I highly recommend Tim Kennedy’s blog. It may not be as good as Crunchy’s but it’s pretty darn close.
I finished all this, Dear Readers, downloaded a few more songs, udated my AIM profile, and found myself staring at the clock, which read five. I was then faced with a difficult decision. Do I continue working on my global scrapbook, so that I’m not scrambling at the last minute? Or do I start talking about the players and the upcoming season? (It’s not like my analysis is going to be all that professional) After carefully contemplating this, I decided that I can actually have the best of both worlds! (Go die, Hanna Montana) I’ll just preview the forwards today, and then I can do some more research afterwards! Aren’t I so smart? (Don’t answer that)
Now, just remember that this is the first time I’m doing more than verbally talking about the players (“Yeah, well, Vanek sucked ASS last year and better make up for it. And I swear to God, if Miller let’s in one more soft goal, I’m having him freaking KILLED”). It’ll be a work in progress, and it might not be all that statbitty, but hopefully it won’t suck too bad!
The 2008-09 Buffalo Sabres (courtesy of that sexy depth chart on Sabres.com)
Last season was: obnoxious.
This season should be: goal-filled.
Last season Thomas Vanek was feeling the stress of being a new father and having a $50 million contract on his head. While the second half of the year gave us reason to hope, the first half of the year was TERRIBLE. He needs to stop trying to be something he’s not. Thomas Vanek is a scorer, and once he gets that through his thick skull, he should be okay.
But I still haven’t forgiven him for ratting me out about my run-in with Stanley. (But it was accidental! And up close, Lord Stanley is one sexy beast.)
Last season was: one of the sole reasons I didn’t commit suicide.
This season should be: just as awesome as last year.
I was not exaggerating above. Every time I was sitting on the coach threatening to slit my wrists over the Sabres’ crappy play, Dan would go score a goal or do something awesome. And then he signed an extension, and he’s even getting married next year (although whether or not the man-child bagged a real chick or his Hanna Montana doll [go die, Hanna Montana] is up for debate), so I’m really feeling the Dan Paille Love.
Last season was: a thoroughly enjoyable experience.
This season should be: a thoroughly enjoyable experience.
I really do love Patrick Kaleta. If he makes the roster this year, he is SO Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend for the ’09-10 season. He has already won that competition. I mean, he still lives at home, he has scored a goal and assisted on a Petey goal (after my parents got home from that game, the very first thing my dad said was, “That should go on a plaque. A Peters goal with assists from Kaleta and Mair.”), his first fight was with Sean Avery, and he is one hell of a hitter. What’s not to love, I ask you?
Last season was: a pleasant surprise.
This season should be: hilarious kickass.
Derek Roy was another one of those bright spots. I mean, he somehow managed to score 32 goals, and some people are even saying the contract he signed last year is starting to look like a bargain. That’s pretty cool. As long as he works on the diving, and keeps up the momentum from a stellar second half of last season, he and Love Potion #9 should be sailing off into clear skies.
Last season was: steady and reliable.
This season should be: steady and reliable.
Jochen Hecht is quite possibly the ONLY player on this entire freaking team I can count on 24/7. If he keeps it up, there will be no Jochen-bashing on this blog.
Last season was: like Goldilocks’s porridge.
This season should be: like Goldilocks’s porridge.
Paul Gaustad isn’t a flashy player. He doesn’t score lots of goals, and he doesn’t get thrown out of the game during his first shift (but I still love you, Petey! Honest!) Goose was taken in like the seventh round, and had no business even getting into the NHL, yet here he is. And after that whole contract extension over the summer, I think he’s going to be sticking around for a while.
Don’t forget he also proves that green is sexy, and he’s even first runner-up in the Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend competition. He knows that if Crunchy starts sucking, he’s my man.
Last season was: um…it’s Adam Mair.
This season should be: um…it’s Adam Mair.
I’ll be perfectly honest with you: I don’t pay all that much attention to Adam Mair. I’m sorry. I get that he’s wonderful and helps animals and all that shit, but when it comes to his on-ice performance, I get too distracted bashing other players to worry about him. But I do love how he has taken it upon himself to protect Patty Kaleta. I think that’s adorable.
I’m in to adorable, in case you hadn’t figured that out by now.
Last season was: nonexistent. Did he even play a game?
This season should be: less injury-plauged? IDK. At this point it seems like he can only go up.
Tim Connolly is supposedly a very good hockey player. That’s what lots of people say. I actually can not remember a time in recent memory when he did play. He could take the ice against the Habs and turn over the puck for every single one of their goals, and it’ll seem like an improvement because at least he’s THERE.
But I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that some of the guys don’t want him back in the dressing room showering with them, because they’re all so afraid they’ll catch something.
Last season was: comme ci comme ca
This season should be: spent out of Lindy’s doghouse.
I vaguely remember hearing about some sort of spat Lindy and Staffy had right before the last game that caused Staffy to be benched. I do not remember details, since I didn’t watch that game. I was babysitting that night, and let the little monsters angels play amongst themselves while I watched the Caps win the Southeast Division on Center Ice. (Before the game when they showed the dressing room and Ovie didn’t have his shirt on, I screamed really loudly, and the kids thought it was the WEIRDEST thing that I was happy to see him without his shirt on. I was like, “Children, you have no idea.”) It was actually kind of awesome. That game was SO COOL, and Ovie was awesome, and the whole team was awesome, and his postgame interview was awesome, but back to the Sabres.
So, if Lindy and Staffy do intead have some sort of issue with each other, I suggest they get it taken care of during training camp so Drew can go back to drinking the blood of virgins. As we all learned from Thomas Vanek, life is Ruff when you’re not on Lindy’s side.
Last season was: cute and cuddly and adorable and OUTRAGEOUSLY KICKASS.
This season should be: not the last one he spends in Buffalo.
Word on the street is that Pommer and his agent have called Friday their deadline for a contract extension, but I refuse to believe that until there is a nice, long contract with his Johnny Hancock on it. I will then proceed to pommerdoodle my heart out.
I have no complaints about his season. He was pretty rad out there.
Last season was: a bit of a rollar coaster, in my professional opinion.
This season should be: a bit less of a roller coaster.
Ales Kotalik is another one of those players I don’t pay that much attention to. I remember him being pretty good in shootouts (specifically the Winter Classic), but I also have this nagging suspicion that he had a few sucky shifts too. I’m not 100%. I should probably pay more attention to each and every player on the team, not just the ones I love/hate.
Last season was: one of the reasons why I wanted to slit my wrists.
This season should be: short for Max the Sabre. Trade him already, Darcy!
Max Afinogenov sucks. He sucks more than I can remember anyone sucking in a really long time. He sucks so much they wouldn’t even let him join the sucky club. He sucks so much that Adolf Hitler took one look at him and went, “You suck.”
But in all seriousness, if no one else will even trade for him, you know it’s bad. I realize that there is an actual chance that Darcy will be able to trade him for a coupon on the Wendy’s dollar menu and then he’ll go on to score 40 goals and lead his new team to the Conference finals, but I really don’t care. Every time he touched the ice, I reached for a knife. When he kept hurting his groin, I cheered. He is not good for my mental (and physical) health. He needs to go away.
Last season was: AHAHAHAAHA.
This season should be: AHAHAHAA.
I love Andrew Peters. I could never love him the way Corinne does, but it’s awfully close. Andrew always makes me laugh. I never even bother with expectations for him. Two goals this year, Mr. Peters. Let’s try for two.
Although I did hear that he might be one of those guys fighting for a roster spot. I honestly can’t imagine a Sabres roster without Andrew Peters. It would be like Thanksgiving without turkey.
And I also have been walking around under the assumption that Andrew Peters (why do I keep calling him by his full name?) thinks he’s my favorite player. I liked to think that Petey Sr. called Petey Jr. and told him how I supposedly love him like I love no other Sabre. I think it’s kinda funny, actually.
Last season was: college hockey, but pretty bitchin’
This season should be: maybe Rochester Portland, hopefully B-lo, but pretty bitchin’
I get that he wasn’t on the depth chart, but as his facebook friend I feel it is my job to talk about how AWESOME he is. Aren’t I such a good BFF? I always make my boyy sound rad.
(shut up. he is, and always shall be, an honorary Sabre)
Last season was: beyond words, bitches.
This season should be: beyond words, bitches.
65 goals. The Hart, Pearsen, Art Ross, and Maurice Richard trophies. Southeast Division champs. A fashion line, and a role in a music video.
Alexander Mikhailovich Ovechkin is here to stay.
P.S. LOADS of warm fuzzies to whomever designed the depth chart. That thing is awesome!
This is the second round of cuts in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend
Toni, see, you’re kind of weird to look at, and your hair changes every five minutes. And you aren’t very good. I just think we would argue too much, and I don’t like arguing with my Boyfriend.
Apparently you got pretty wasted at the Catwalk for Charity last winter, so I’m worried that you might be a borderline alcoholic. Considering I’m not even a legal drinker yet, I don’t see how that would work. Sorry. Sober up, and then we’ll talk.
Hey, man, this is all me. It’s not you. See, as a rule, I loathe dislike people who go by the name Nathan. If you legally change your first name, I’d be more than happy to re-enter you in the competition. You’re still invited to join the Latin Lovers club, however, because your last name has “ae,” which is a diphthong and is also used in the first declension for genitive singular and nominative plural and I think another one that I can’t remember because it’s August . Wooohooo Latin!
Well, those are all the cuts for today! Check back in tomorrow for Round Three to find out who has what it takes to be America’s Next Top Model Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.