Welcome To Rock Bottom

February 28, 2009 at 9:51 pm | Posted in Alex Ovechkin, Alexander Semin, Buffalo Sabres, Clarke MacArthur, Dan Paille, Frostee Does Predictions!, Henrik Tallinder, Hockey Gods, Huh?, Jochen Hecht, Losing Sucks, New York Islanders, Patrick Lalime, That was absolutely terrible., This Irks Me, Thomas Vanek, Thought-provoking Stuff, Tim Connolly, Trading Madness!, Washington Capitals | 4 Comments

Embarrassing is the only word I can really think of to describe that game.  Getting shut out is bad enough, but getting shut out to the Islanders?  Really?

It makes me sad that the Sabres can’t get a win for Lala.  He’s been really reliable these past few games and has been making great saves, but apparently it’s way too much to ask the Sabres to actually score a freaking goal.  I don’t care how many good chances they had in the first period tonight, Harry.  Chances mean absolutely nothing when the team can’t actually score.  

Trade deadline is Wednesday.  I love the trade deadline because GMs can always be counted on to make completely wacky-doodle trades.  There’s been a lot of talk surrounding a Connolly trade but I actually don’t think Timmy’ll get traded.  He’s too important to this team right now and I get the feeling that Darcy will at least try to resign him.  I definitely expect to see Tallinder shipped out (sorry Heather), and even though I tear up just thinking about it I worry about Pie.  MacArthur has done absolutely nothing memorable lately and I really want Jochen Hecht to go away.  Tallinder, Hecht, and MacArthur might seem like a good package to some of those wacko GMs who go wild on deadline day.  

Semin’s OT winner in the Caps/Bruins game today was fantastic.  I feel really bad for Timtom but when goals like that are scored you can’t help but laugh.

TV is supposed to be back by Wednesday.  If the hockey gods have any mercy at all he will.  

Don Cherry seems to think Alex’s goal celebrations make him like Sean Avery.  Huh.  I really don’t see where he gets that from.  I do know that part of what makes the Capitals so fun to watch is their obvious love for the game and their excitement when they score.  Watching them get incredibly fired up by goals makes me really happy.

Speaking of the Capitals, uh, there’s still room on the bandwagon.  I don’t want to be a Debbie Downer but I’m just puttin’ it out there…

A Simple Request

February 28, 2009 at 9:38 am | Posted in Buffalo Sabres | Leave a comment

Dear Buffalo Sabres,

Please win tonight.  That’s all.

With Love,


When The Sabres Get You Down, Picture This (#59)

February 27, 2009 at 3:54 pm | Posted in 65 Reasons I Love A.M.O., Alex Ovechkin, Buffalo Sabres, Frostee Loves Way Too Many Guys, Jaroslav Spacek, Lars Nicklas Backstrom, Losing Sucks, Mike Green, Patrick Kaleta, Patrick Lalime, Thomas Vanek, Washington Capitals, What Is Up With All These Injuries? | 4 Comments

Michael Green.  Nicklas Backstrom.  Alexander Ovechkin.  A hot tub.  Just let it all sink in, especially you ladies.  Call me a puckbunny, but that is QUITE the pleasing visual.  I just watched “Day In The Life.”  It was kind of amazing.  I kind of love the Capitals.  And Alex’s new nickname?  Kind of cute.  I am SO screaming “SUPERSTAR” at him next time I go to a Caps game.

I love the Sabres, but I kind of hate them.  They came out for the first two periods and I didn’t even recognize them because they were actually playing well.  Lala was actually stopping pucks.  It was incredible.  PATRICK KALETA scored a goal.  I LOVE when that happens.  Then in the third period they completely fell apart.  If not for Lala I’m pretty sure they would have lost 8-1.  I can’t believe not a single Sabre could score in the shootout.  That’s terrible.  Lala played so well, especially for a guy with the FLU.  He deserved a win.  When Patrick Kaleta scores a goal, and Patrick Lalime plays as well as he did, the Sabres need to win that game for them.

Jaro is hurt.  He’s such a sturdy little caveman and I miss him already.  Poor thing.

Thomas Vanek is TALKING.  Like, actually MOVING HIS MOUTH.  Aside from Lala’s play, I’m pretty sure we can consider that to be a positive.  

The negative from last night was that the Sabres only got one point, Carolina’s in an eighth-place tie, and things aren’t looking too good.  I tried being optimistic, but now I just plain doubt whether or not they’ll make the postseason.  Last night was a make-or-break game.  Tomorrow night’s game is a rock bottom game.  Lose that, and it’s game over.

The wonderful Clare sent me a fantastic picture last night after I discovered that Mama Ovechkin has returned to our wonderful country.  This picture involves Nicklas Backstrom, and it basically sums up why I love that boy.

p1010302Seriously, Dear Readers?  I want to adopt him.  I mean, look at his face!  He’s so confused!!  And he’s either reaching into his pocket or being all sassy with his hand on his hip, and I’m pretty sure it’s the latter.  If, God forbid, something happens to his parents, PLEASE tell his family that I will take him into my home.  I’ll make sure he eats his vegetables and teach him to be a good person. It’s not even like I want to marry Nick.  I just want to be able to take him and Pommer on outings to the zoo and trips to the movies to see the latest Pixar film.  

I actually figured out how I’ll be able to watch the Caps game tomorrow afternoon, study, and write a paper on Darwin’s theories and how Pat Frank uses them to enrich Alas, Babylon as a novel.  I’ll be on a tight schedule but should be able to accomplish most if not all of it by the time the Sabres play.  Woo!

Mama Ovechkin Is In Da House!!!

February 26, 2009 at 8:17 pm | Posted in Get Yer Paws Off My Man, Happy!! | Leave a comment

Guys, I don’t want to overexcite you, but right now, at this very minute, Mama Ovechkin is IN THE UNITED STATES.  She is in the SAME country we are.  She is a seven-hour drive, 45-minute flight from where I am sitting right this very minute.  I’m so excited that she’s here for a visit that I’m not even all that mad about her watching the game with Alex’s new girlfriend.

I Hate Going To The Dentist

February 26, 2009 at 2:57 pm | Posted in Buffalo Sabres, Thought-provoking Stuff | 1 Comment

Unfortunately, that’s where I’m headed in a few minutes.  My dentist is a lovely man, but his hygienist enjoys randomly stabbing me in the gums and then asking me questions and giving me the evil eye when I try to answer them.  Uh, HELLO, don’t ask me a question if you don’t want me to answer it.

If you have NHL Network you should have already set it to DVR “Day In The Life” tonight.  I can’t tell you how excited I am.  I will most likely watch it multiple times.

The Caps play the Thrashers tonight.  Kovie vs. Ovie!  Woo!  My new favorite team vs. last year’s new favorite team!  The cuddliness of it all!

I considered Tuesday’s game to be a statement game.  That’s what I call games that, well, make a statement.  If the Sabres won it would most likely say that they could come together as a team and play in front of Lala.  Then they lost, so the only statement they made was that they couldn’t pull off a win when the points were critical.  Tonight’s game is starting to seem like a make-or-break game.  Carolina is right behind them and Buffalo needs to be able to steal two points from them.  If they can’t, I think it’ll be pretty safe to say that they really might not make the playoffs and will have to claw their way in if they do.  In all honestly, I’ve managed to remain very calm about this whole “the Sabres will probably miss the playoffs again” thing.  Last year I was having panic attacks and going batshit crazy, but this year I’ve managed to maintain my cool.  In a way, by missing the playoffs the Sabres would be able to keep my hockey yin and yang in check.  I need my body to be harmonious to keep my chi force flowing, and if the Caps are going to make the playoffs the Sabres would just have to miss it.


Aw, hell.  I totally want the Sabres to make the playoffs.  I might cry if they don’t.

If I Wasn’t A Sabres Fan I Would Be Laughing My Behind Off

February 25, 2009 at 5:10 pm | Posted in Alex Ovechkin, Anaheim Ducks, Buffalo Sabres, I Was At The Game!, Jason Pominville, Jhonas Enroth, Losing Sucks, Nathan Paetsch, Patrick Lalime, Paul Gaustad, Ryan Miller, Sidney Crosby, Toni Lydman, What Is Up With All These Injuries? | Leave a comment

Actually, I am still chuckling to myself.  I think it’s because last night I accepted that the Sabres will not make the playoffs, so now I can just take a very casual stance on the rest of the season.  I’ll still root for them, but I won’t freak myself out over the standings and points and games in hand. 

I actually had a really awesome post all planned out for today, but then I got slammed with three hours of homework and a test next Friday in my HARDEST class.  This test will involve Chinese agricultural inventions and how they evolved into that John Deere lawnmower you’ve got out in your garage, just to give you an idea.  And my parents are dragging me along as a third-wheel to their anniversary dinner.  I have no idea what they’re going to do when I leave for college.  So, super-fast:

  • Lydman is outrageously bad.  I really couldn’t believe it.  He stays out for the longest shift of his career and then coughs up the puck.  I don’t blame Patty for that goal.  I blame Lydman.
  • Jason Pominville is so bad at hockey I couldn’t believe it.   WHAT is going on with him?
  • Two Canadian guys were sitting behind us and the more they drank, the more pronounced their accents got.  Listening to them say “Timmy” was fantastic.  Listening to them mispronounce “Kotalik” and “Tallinder” was not.
  • That shorthanded goal completely changed the game.  It was pretty quiet in there after that.
  • That third goal was disgusting.  I could not believe Patty let that in.  He was just sitting in the left side of the crease while the Anaheim player walked in.
  • We left before Goose rearranged Getzlaf’s face so I have no comment on that.
  • There were two highlights to my evening last night:  The first was hearing the drunk Canadians behind us call Giguere a slut at the beginning of the third.  The second was seeing Miller and Patches up in the press box before the game started.
  • Lala is now sick, and Enroth appears to be our started.  This is the reason for the title of my post.  It’s really funny when you think about it.
  • Read this. 
  • I just want to thank everyone for the birthday wishes.  It was really sweet of you guys.  Jill, that deCAPitate thing was hilarious.  Clare, you should start a business making those for stalkers across the nation.

I Really Don’t Feel Like Watching A Sinking Ship

February 24, 2009 at 4:34 pm | Posted in 65 Reasons I Love A.M.O., Alex Ovechkin, Buffalo Sabres, Mike Green | 3 Comments

Tonight is either going to be awesome or terrible.  Um, Sabres?  It’s my birthday.  It’s already infinitely better than last year’s because last year I spent the entire day working on a career project and an oral presentation I had to give the next day.  This year I got a cute scarf from one friend and a Tim Horton’s gift card from another, so please, for the love of the hockey gods, PLAY A GOOD GAME.

The best thing that could happen tonight would be for the Sabres to jump out and score like three goals right away.  That would take a lot of the pressure off Lala as he tries to get acclimated to starting.  

I’m pretty sure NHL Network Online is giving me this as a birthday present.  It is #58 and I have now watched it three times.  But, um, boys?  Don’t kill yourselves, please.

Monday Ramblings: Ankle Edition

February 23, 2009 at 5:17 pm | Posted in Alex Ovechkin, Alexander Semin, Bobbleheads, Buffalo Sabres, Get Yer Paws Off My Man, Henrik Zetterberg, Hockey Gods, Jhonas Enroth, Patrick Lalime, Pavel Datsyuk, Philadelphia Flyers, Randomness, Ryan Miller, Sidney Crosby, This Irks Me, Thomas Vanek, What Is Up With All These Injuries? | 1 Comment

Dear Ryan Miller’s Ankle,

Screw you.

With Love,


Dear Buffalo Sabres,

As you know, tomorrow is my birthday (checks should be made out to Frostee, gift cards should be to either Forever 21 or the iTunes Store, and cold hard cash is always appreciated).  It also happens to be the night you play the Anaheim Ducks.  I am trying to take a positive attitude about this whole thing, but I’ll be honest.  It’s not easy.

First there’s the matter of this whole Miller-having-a-high-ankle-sprain thing.  Being raised by hockey fans, there were two things I have been taught my entire life.  The first is that the Philadelphia Flyers are bad and should be openly loathed (hey, my dad grew up going to Rangers and Islanders games).  The second is that high ankle sprains are probably one of the worst injuries hockey players could get.  Groin injuries are also pretty bad.  See, Miller is most likely out until the end of the season unless the hockey gods do us a solid and throw a miracle our way.  Patrick Lalime is now your starting goaltender and you called up Jhonas Enroth today.  I’ve given this a lot of thought, and there are two possible outcomes from this scenario:

1)  You, the Buffalo Sabres, band together in an incredible show of team unity and play in front of Patty as you have never played before, guiding yourselves into the playoffs.

2)  You completely implode and get an early summer for the second year in a row.

I’m trying to be optimistic about all this, Sabres, I really am.  It’s just that the way you depend on Ryan Miller to always save your collective asses and the way you suck in front of Lala has me worried.  Who knows.  Maybe we dedicated fans will be rewarded with Outcome #1.  Maybe we won’t.

Then there’s the matter of your birthday greetings policy.  As you know, people put birthday wishes up on the jumbotron at games.  Yesterday when we were all preparing lunch, my dad came downstairs and told me that he’s really sorry, but HSBC has a policy that you have to call at least three days in advance to get a birthday greeting.  As he called only two days in advance, there would be no special surprise for me.  I actually can not tell you how devastated I was to hear this.

So, Sabres, I really need you to win this game tomorrow.  I haven’t been to a good game since November 1.  I may have had fun at the one at the end of December, but that’s because I liked the other team enough to overlook the fact that you apparently sucked balls.  The one in the middle of December was pretty bad too.  Then there’s also the matter of the critical two points you could pick up.  And, of course, a win on my birthday would be simply marvelous.

With Love,


  • Tom Renney got fired.  It was only a matter of time.
  • The Alex Ovechkin/Sidney Crosby bitch fight made ESPN this morning.  Personally, I thought the wave was amusing.  And personally, I’m going to side with Alex and Bruce and the rest of the Washington Capitals.  Sid kind of needed to shut his mouth yesterday.  Personally, I prefer Alex’s playing style to Sidney’s because I love me a man who can score goals AND throw hits.  A friend of mine is a Penguins/Crosby fan and even she admitted to me today that he’s kind of a wuss. Personally, I think it’s really funny how none of the Penguins want to stick up for Crosby.  Personally, I’m just glad the Caps won.
  • I told my mother that if she went with me to the game tomorrow night we would have to go down during the pre-game skate and shout inappropriate things at Ryan Getzlaf, but since it’s looking like Papa Frostee will be going with me instead, we’ll just heckle Chris Simpson.
  • I won’t go into details, because the details are hilarious but time-consuming, but there’s this one kid who’s been in several of my classes for the past few years.  He’s a total creeper in addition to being incredibly rude.  He does this weird thing where he’ll get a crush on a girl and just follow her around for several days.  He back-talks to teachers on a regular basis.  He doesn’t like me or any of my friends, and just to prove how nice he is he told us that he would kill us in our sleep.  This charming young man also happens to be a Red Wings fan, an insufferable one at that.  He thoroughly enjoys trash-talking the Sabres, and when the Wings won the Cup last season we knew he’d be awful to be around.  The next day he wore his signed Pavel Datsyuk jersey (I was so jealous) to school, and I informed him that while Candy Corn Head is a great player, I still prefer Mr. Henrik Zetterberg.  The kid started screaming at me about how Henrik is probably the most overrated player in the league and he’s not any good and Pavel is easily the best player on the team and the best in the NHL.  It was really funny.  Now, last week I started getting Facebook Mobile texts informing me that he was trying to add me as a friend on Facebook.  Since I, well, don’t like him, I rejected him.  Four times.  I finally just gave up and added him.  Today he commented on a picture I have.  Not only does this prove he was Facebook stalking me, but it also confuses me slightly.  See, he commented on the picture of me with Mini Alex that I took last year during the playoffs.  His comment read, “seriously ovechkin?  jk jk jk he’s clearly the best russian player in the league.”  Hmm.  This is the same kid that informed me in no uncertain terms that Pavel Datsyuk is the best player in the world.  I kind of want to shake him and shout, “But what about PAVEL?!??!  You told me PAVEL! was the BEST PLAYER in the WORLD!”
  • Speaking of Alex, I’m choosing to ignore that picture of him over at Puck Daddy.
  • Alexander Semin is following me on Twitter.  This is kind of awesome.
  • TV is back skating with the team.  Woo!  
  • COMPLETELY unrelated to hockey, but what do you think the chances are of my teacher figuring out I made up 100% of what I wrote about the North Korean economy?  There was nothing on the websites she told us to use.  I bullshit on projects regularly, but this is just plan making stuff up.  Thank goodness we only have give the website.

Let’s Just Try To Not Think About It

February 22, 2009 at 4:03 pm | Posted in Patrick Lalime, This Irks Me | Leave a comment

Trying…..trying…..failing.  Even the Caps game couldn’t put in in an, “Oh, well,” attitude.


So I guess it’s In Patty We Trust from now on.

Oh Dear God

February 21, 2009 at 9:31 pm | Posted in Bobbleheads, Ryan Miller, Scott Gomez, What Is Up With All These Injuries?, Winning Is Totally Awesome | Leave a comment

If Miller’s out long-term, I seriously worry about the playoffs.  I need Little Ryan to hold me close and promise me it will be all right.

Scott Gomez is dead to me.

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