3 Reasons Why I Don’t Mind My Brother Going To The Game Tonight, and Other Notes

November 26, 2008 at 3:19 pm | Posted in Alex Ovechkin, Chris Clark, Mike Comrie, Randomness, What Is Up With All These Injuries? | 2 Comments

1.  The hockey game tonight is against Boston, and as I’ve said before, I hate seeing Boston.  I don’t really feel like slowly killing my soul right before Thanksgiving.

2.  Ben may be going tonight, but I get to go on the 12th against Toronto because he has a concert for school, I will most likely be able to go on the 30th – wait, what team was it, again?  Don’t they have a player that I kind of like?  Hmm – because our mafia connections are apparently going to pull through, and I’ll be going in February against Anaheim because not letting me, of all people, go to a hockey game on my birthday is just cruel.

3.  I’m kind of tired, and I’m looking forward to bumming around in my pajamas tonight and screaming at the TV.

  • Dear S.L. Price,  Dude, you couldn’t be more right! Because all joking and “oh my God his chest is a work of art”-related squealing aside, this is why I love him.  This explains it perfectly.  With Love, Frostee.   (But I would absolutely dispute your decision if it meant he would show up on my front step.  Eeee!  Can you imagine!)
  • Good grief.
  • I can not believe Spencer and Heidi eloped.  LAME!  (Just for the record, I have never watched an episode of The Hills before in my life and don’t plan too.  I’m just a religious reader of Us Weekly who happens to find Speidi, especially Spencer, repulsive.)
  • When I first heard that Pie was scratched tonight, I got all freaked out and starting whining that Drew Stafford, my new Facebook friend, should have been scratched.  But then I saw that he was sick, so while I hope he feels better soon, it’s not as bad.
  • Scene:  Frostee walks into the kitchen after getting off the bus.  Frostee:  Hey, everyone.  Frostee’s Dad:  Your secret boyfriend is out for at least three weeks with an arm injury!  Frostee:  No!  Chrissy!
  • I have to read Great Expectations this weekend.  Eh.
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I Don’t Really Like Afternoon Hockey (Sabres @ Islanders, 10/13/08)

October 13, 2008 at 2:10 pm | Posted in Adam Mair, Ales Kotalik, Andrew Peters, Buffalo Sabres, Clarke MacArthur, Craig Rivet, Dan Paille, Happy!!, Jaroslav Spacek, Jason Pominville, Jochen Hecht, Mike Comrie, New York Islanders, Other Teams' Back-up Goalies Kind of Suck, Patrick Kaleta, Patrick Lalime, Rick DiPietro, Ryan Miller, Thomas Vanek, Winning Is Totally Awesome | Leave a comment

Um, I really don’t like afternoon hockey games.  They really bug me.  I like hockey games on nights when I don’t have school the next day.  I like curling up on the coach in my pajamas, not sitting at the desk trying to do homework and crane my neck at the TV at the same time.

Pregame

Ah, Kevin Sylvester.  How I have missed you.  The pregame show is on, and I am loving the messy-haired Crunchy interview.  I have this weird love of players with messy, sweaty, post-game hair.  I find it adorable.

Lalime is getting his start this afternoon.  I’m not sure if I should be worried or not.  He was pretty solid in the preseason.  I’m also not sure if I want Rick to play or not.  I wouldn’t mind getting Mr. Back-up if it meant getting to see Ricky without his helmet.  They don’t call him Pretty Ricky for nothing.

Okay, time to work on my Robert Mugabe research.  I’ll update with thoughts at each intermission.  Let’s Go Buffalo!!!

Hmm, sounds like Lindy doesn’t like afternoon games either.  That’s pretty cool.

So is spaghetti for breakfast!  Jealous!  

P.S.  Clare, thank you so much for the picture!  I LOVE it!!!   Reader Award to you!

First Period  1-0, Sabres

(These are basically my thoughts on the period as it was happening.  There is NOTHING on Mugabe’s thoughts on African tribes online)

  • Whoa, Jochen Hecht!  You badass.   Sabres score on the man advantage!  1-0.
  • Geez, Mike.  And just when I thought Hilary had made you go soft.  Leave our boyz alone.  (I think it’s hilarious that Mike Comrie was the highest scorer on the Islanders last year)
  • Ugh.  Just when I thought the Sabres’ power play was getting better, they don’t score in another four minute man advantage.  Nice job, Boyz.

End of period thoughts:  Lalime has looked solid from all the way back here in the kitchen, and it hasn’t sounded like the Sabres have been doing anything too bone-headed.  Time to register for Survey Savvy, then we can start the next period!

Guys, there wasn’t anything uber-important in that Darcy Regier interview, was there?  I was too busy eating a banana to listen.

Second Period  5-0 Sabres

  • Ehmagod I totally love Adam Mair!!!   2-0, Sabres!!!  (McDonald, that was absolutely terrible)  
  • You know what?  Screw working on my book project.  Word is being a retard (or, as Gena likes to put it, a “fucktard”) and the project isn’t even due until the 27th.  I’m just going to watch some good ol’ hockey.
  • Dear Readers, I don’t know about  you, but I think Patrick Lalime has been looking very trustworthy thus far.  Wouldn’t it be so nice if we all didn’t have to freak out about our back-up this year?
  • Whatevs, Al.  Just take a penalty.   At least I get to see “Kaltsy” now!  (I’ve decided that I like Pkaleta on the PK.  It’s almost as nice as Ovie on the PK)
  • 15 shorties, Islanders?  Wow.  You guys really do suck.
  • THOMAS VANEK PUTS A SHORTIE HOME!   WOOO!!!   3-0, SABRES!!!   The verdict is in, Dear Readers:  Frostee is starting to develop a soft spot for Thomas Vanek.  What the hell is up with this?
  • POPULATION OF POMINVILLE HAS MOVED UP AGAIN!!  POMMERDOODLING!!!!!!   4-0 Sabres!
  • Yet another reason why I love Pkaleta.  Did you see that body slam?!?!  And Craig Rivet, I do not appreciate your attempts at making me love you.  
  • Adam Mair, you are an OUTRAGEOUS BADASS.  
  • EEE now Teppo is being all sexy and captain-y as he fills in for Rivet.  And I feel so bad for Petey!   He was stuck on the bench when the fight started!  (My dad is at work and texted me to find out what happened in the fight and he asked “Omg! Wheres Petey?”)
  • Um, who is the blood from?  Because that’s really gross.  I hope the B-lo Boyz are okay!!!
  • What the HELL.  I am totally in love with Thomas Vanek.  This is so annoying.  Thomas, if you score more goals that Ovie this year, you die.   5-0 Sabres!!!
  • I just missed the last two minutes of play because I was discussing meeting Ovie with my dad.  He thinks Dr. Bisson won’t be able to get me in to meet the Capitals, since it’s the Capitals.  I told him to ask if I could meet the Sabres, and then I could go into the Capitals room and pretend I was dyslexic/illiterate.  Because sometimes I think I am dyslexic/illiterate.
  • Mairsy is back!  And yes, I did just reenact the Kaleta body slam for my dad.  This will be so much easier when we have DVR.
  • Um, why is Thompson going to the dressing room?  I’m really confused.  Maybe I should stop messing around on Facebook and just watch the game.
  • Spacek’s in the sin bin.  Delay of game penalties are lame.
  • Gosh darn it, Pommer.  I wanted you to score there!!!  (Wouldn’t two shorties be so awesomely kickass?)
  • Fuck.  Did I just hear that Paille is hurt?  Fuck.
  • Wait, I’m confused.  Do the Islanders want to lose?
  • Good grief.  Mike Comrie, what are we going to do with you?  *shakes head*
  • Wait, Paille appears to be okay.  He’s sitting up on the bench and everything.  Phew.
  • Dammit, Thomas!  Why are you making me love you so much!!
  • And now we are treated to “sensitive” Al Kotalik.  Awww.

Third Period.  Final score: 7-1 Sabres.

But first, a few more thoughts from the intermission report:

  • Did Kevin Sylvester just say that Adam Mair has an upper body injury?  Because, you know, that’s not very good.
  • Craig Rivet might not play on Wednesday?!!?  The Rangers are undefeated!  We need Rivet!!  No!!!

Okay, third period stuff now:

  • Ehmagod Crunchy just walked by!!  He’s got his skull cap on!!  Yay!!!   
  • My sudden squealing problem is even more concerning than my new-found love of Thomas Vanek.  
  • Whoa, Harry.  She’s probably young enough to be your daughter.
  • My brother just asked why it says that it’s the second period.  Geez.  Get it right, guys.
  • WOOO!!!   Kotalik sends it home on the 5-on-3!   6-0 Sabres!!
  • Whoa, Tony Romo is out for four weeks with a broken pinkie!  Ahahaha.  He has a broken pinkie. 
  • Ah, fudge.  I was hoping for a Lalime shutout.  But the Islanders and their fans don’t actually think that the Islanders are going to make some miracle comeback and win now, do they?
  • Al’s in the sin bin?  Why?
  • And Vanek’s going for goaltender interference?    You know what is the most concerning about all this?  I don’t feel a burning desire to cut of Thomas’s head for taking a penalty.  I just want to hug him and tell him that it’s okay.  I do not like this, Dear Readers. I do not like this one bit.
  • GOAL!!!   That was a GORGEOUS play, Clarke.  Gorgeous.  And it’s good to see that Paille is okay!!  7-1 Sabres.
  • Oh my God, they’re playing the Spongebob theme song.  I’m not gonna lie, that’s totally awesome.
  • Petey just got a roughing, but so did some Isle.  Oh, Petey.
  • I’m starting to remember how much I loved the music they play at Nassau Coliseum.  Now they’re playing “Welcome to the Black Parade”
  • Is it just me, or has this game gotten slightly boring?  There are only three minutes left and there appears to be a lot of skating up and down the ice.
  • Oh, no, wait, Mair just got slashed.  I guess he doesn’t have an upper body injury, then!
  • What the HELL is up with the Islander’s mascot?  It’s like some sort of dragon or something.
  • 146 penalty minutes, eh?  Good.  I kind of like hockey fights.  Not stupid, “we don’t really know how to fight so we’re just going to hug each other for a really long time” fights, but real, sticking up for your teammates, tough guy fights.  And fights with the Pkaleta Body Slam.
  • OMG I LOVE “What I’ve Done”!!!   Can the Sabres play all of their games  in Nassau Coliseum?  Because not only will they win, we will get to hear awesome music.
  • Who are the Islanders kidding?  They’re gonna win the first draft pick in June.  You heard it here first.
  • EEE Crunchy!!!   Happy Crunchy!!   
  • Seriously, Kevin?  “It was probably harder than it looked?”  This is probably one of the easiest wins I’ve ever seen.
  • Dear Readers, I love Lindy Ruff.  He is the awesomest coach.  I can’t believe this is the first post filed in my new “Lindy Ruff” category.
  • Is it just me, or did Lalime look like Crunchy in that first shot of him?  that kind of spooky.  Speaking of guys that look like Crunchy, we decided that Ryan Gosling kind of looks like a wonky brow-less him.
  • Ehmagod, I love Patrick Lalime.  He’s adorable and well-spoken.  
  • Shit I was just thinking dreamily of Patrick Lalime and missed who they said might be out with an injury. Who is it??  I’m panicking!!

I’m just going to have to find out who’s hurt later.  Now I have to go shower so that after my lesson is over I can watch the Caps!!

That was an awesome game, I’m not going to lie.  If the Sabres beat the Rangers on Wednesday, I think I will go crazy.  

I can’t believe they’re undefeated!!   *squeals more* 

***UPDATE***

Hecht is hurt?  Hecht?!?!  No!!!!!  Yo-yo!!

It’s Getting Closer!! (Tim Kennedy is Just an Ugly Version of Pkane)

September 13, 2008 at 10:36 am | Posted in Buffalo Sabres, Happy!!, John Tavares, Mike Comrie, Patrick Kaleta, Patrick Kane, Ryan Miller, Tim Kennedy | Leave a comment

Hockey is almost here.  Between the cold weather, my first cold, the shitload of homework/tests/global problems scrapbooks I have due (but a scrapbook?  I HATE scrapbooking.  I’m not creative in that way), and the Bills, it’s becoming apparent that hockey is, in fact, on its way back to Buffalo.  And a bunch of the Sabres are already back in town!  They’re holding group skates!  They’re shopping at Wegman’s!!!

And I think Patty Kaleta only got hotter over the summer.  Them B-lo boys sure are lookers!

But not this one.  The night after the draft, I was watching TV in my parents’ room and describing the Sabres’ draft picks to my mom.  When I got to Tim Kennedy, I cracked up and said, “You can totally tell he’s from South Buffalo.  He’s like an ugly version of Patrick Kane.”  The first part was actually kind of Orchard Park Snob-ish of me to say, but, unfortunately, it’s true.  Watching the video of all Da Boyz at the skate and seeing his interview cemented that opinion in my head.  Tim Kennedy may be the nicest, most pure-hearted hockey player in the WORLD, but I will forever think of him in this way.

                                                        

 

                            <<<<                                

 

 

 

No contest there.

Note to Crunchy:  Ryan, when I was talking about the perfect amount of stubble, that’s what I meant.  Shave it, and you look a wee bit odd.  Grow anymore, and you’ll find out part of why I call you Crunchy.  Right now it’s like Goldilocks’s porridge.  Just right.

 

And yesterday on E! News they showed Mike Comrie and Hilary Duff being attacked by the paparazzi outside some Hollywood restaurant.  Shouldn’t he be back on Long Island yet?  I mean, I’m sure he knows just as well as I that the only thing Long Island has a chance of winning is the John Tavares sweepstake, but still.  He should at least PRETEND to be worried about his team.

P.S. John Tavares is kind of hot.

The Hotties and Notties of the NHL, Part 2

July 18, 2008 at 5:19 pm | Posted in Brian Campbell, Chris Drury, Daniel Alfredsson, Daniel Briere, Drew Stafford, Jordan Staal, Mats Sundin, Maxim Afinogenov, Mike Comrie, Ray Emery, Sean Avery, Sidney Crosby, Thomas Vanek, Tim Connolly, Toni Lydman, Zdeno Chara | 2 Comments

Several days ago, we took a look at the 20 hottest players in the NHL.  Today, we will be focusing on the 20 ugliest guys in the league.

The Notties (In no particular order)

Max Afinogenov, Buffalo Sabres.     Sucking is not hot, Max.  Neither is working for the Russian Mafia.

 

 

Mike Modano, Dallas Stars.  Basically, this is just leftover from the 1999 Stanley Cup Finals.  I actually do kinda like him for looking like Jon Heder’s clone.  And that chipmunk face he made in that Stanley Cup Playoffs promo.

 

Thomas Vanek, Buffalo Sabres.  $50 million is not attractive.  Especially not for the “Vanek Attack.”  It’s also not that attractive admitting on television that when you aren’t playing hockey, you are playing X-box.

 

Brett Hull, Dallas Stars.   YOU SUCK!!!!

 

 

 

Drew Stafford, Buffalo Sabres.  In keeping with my whole, “Jacob is better than Edward” thing, I just have this to say: Drinking the blood of virgins is not attractive, Staffy.  I’m sorry.

 

 

Zdeno Chara, Boston Bruins.  Basically, Zdeno, I’m just scared of what you’ll do to poor, short little Nathan Gerbe next year.  That’s all.

 

 

Mats Sundin, Current Team Unknown.  Okay, Mats.  Either sign that 2 year, $20 million offer in Vancouver so that after an October game we never have to see your overrated ass again, or go to back to Sweden and never bother us again.

 

Dominik Hasek, Detroit Red Wings.

I refused to believe that he’s really retiring, in light of all this Brett Favre drama.  But don’t think I don’t know what you did to get out of Buffalo, Dominik.  Don’t think for a second that we all don’t know.

Daniel Briere, Philadelphia Flyers.  There is nothing hot about a greasy whore.  There isn’t anything hot about spearing a totally innocent guy in the balls, either.

 

Daniel Alfredsson, Ottawa Senators.  We know that your team was sucking majorly, Alfie, but that’s no excuse for firing a puck at Scott Niedermayer’s face.  Getting swept in the first round by a bunch of underaged boys isn’t all that attractive, either.

 

Brian Campbell, Chicago Blackhawks.  There is nothing hot about greed, Soupy.  There isn’t anything hot about your hair with your new ‘hawks jersey either.  I hope you freeze at the Winter Classic this year.

 

 

Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins.  Okay, I am fully aware that I am going to be attacked by a herd of angry Crosby fangirls.  (And angry fanboys)  And please understand, it’s not that I don’t like him.  I do like him.  Actually, I feel really bad for the kid.  He has no friends.  
He has no idea how to do an interview without getting an assistant coach somewhere fired.  I would totally be Sidney’s friend.  I really would.  

All that said, I have to tell you, Sid.  If you have any hope of getting off the Nottie list and onto the Hottie one, you need to stop admitting that Mario talks to you about having safe sex with girls.  Very uncool.

Toni Lydman, Buffalo Sabres.   Just…..no.

 

 

 

Jeff Finger, Toronto Maple Leafs.  

Who are you????

 

 

Tim Connolly, Buffalo Sabres.  I’m really sorry, Timmy.  I do like you, I really do.  It’s just…you’re too, well, fragile for my taste.  Sorry about all this.

 

 

Mike Comrie, New York Islanders.  I am well aware that he is dating Hilary Duff.  I had to wade through a whole mess of pictures of them kissing just to find this one.  But sleeping with your ex-teammate’s wife is not hot.  Infidelity gets you on the Nottie list, Mike.  

 

Jordan Staal, Pittsburgh Penguins.  It’s his mugshot.  Need I say more?

 

 

 

Chris Drury, New York Rangers.  A picture’s worth a thousand words.  Chris Drury, however, is not.

 

 


Sean Avery, Dallas Stars.  I don’t care if Marty Brodeur is fat, and I don’t care if he slept with his wife’s sister-in-law.  He is still a totally badass goalie, and therefore Sean should not be waving his stick like an idiot in front of his face.  No wonder Elisha Cuthbert dumped him.

Ray Emery, Russian League.  I know that he technically no longer plays in the NHL, but I figured for him I could make an exception.  He does drugs, fights with his teammates, and had a convicted rapist on his mask.  N-O-T-T-I-E!

 

 

 

And that about sums it up!  I was really surprised with some of the people who ended up on this list; I guess some guys were just so ugly I blocked out their names.

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