I HAVE WITNESSED PERFECTION (#49)

December 30, 2008 at 11:08 pm | Posted in 65 Reasons I Love A.M.O., Alex Ovechkin, Buffalo Sabres, Chris Clark, Frostee Loves Way Too Many Guys, Happy!!, I Was At The Game!, Lars Nicklas Backstrom, Lindy Ruff, Losing Sucks, Mike Green, Nathan Gerbe, This Irks Me, Washington Capitals, What Is Up With All These Injuries? | 3 Comments

But before I discuss that perfection, I have two things to say about the Sabres:

1.  They are not very good at hockey.  I actually think they might suck at it.

2.  I honestly think that Nate-dogg would fit in the palm of my hand.

pc300355Okay, so on to the perfection.

ITS NAME IS ALEXANDER OVECHKIN.  IT IS BEAUTIFUL AND TALL AND FLEXIBLE AND HOT DAMN, IS IT FAST.

pc300337PERFECTION is a funny, funny guy.  During the warmup, when I may or may not have had my face pressed against the glass to try and get a good picture, he decided to start banging up against the glass to get it moving for all the devoted fans.  THE SIDE OF MY FACE IS NOW TENDER, THANKS TO PERFECTION.

Alex was entranced by the clips from America’s Funniest Home Videos during the first period, but couldn’t care less about the Kiss Cam.

Alex has a habit at a lot of commercial breaks.  He takes off his helmet, pours water all over his face and neck, dries off his head and wipes down the visor before putting his helmet back on.

Alex may or may not have ADD.  At every stoppage in play he was getting up and sitting on the edge of the bench and skating in circles.  

Alex likes grape Gatorade best, from what I can tell.

Alex is a really, really good hockey player.  You wouldn’t believe it.  He also has a really sexy on-ice voice.  I totally swooned when he shouted, “Go!  Go!” at Nick Backstrom.

Nick Backstrom has the most gorgeous blonde hair I have ever seen in my life.  I really want to run my fingers through it.  Kind of like Lane on “Gilmore Girls.”

Chris Clark recognized me.  I swear.  My dad came down while I was staring at Alex and goes, “Um, Chris Clark was just staring at you and he looked like he recognized you.”  Later on I caught him looking again, and I waved every time he skated by.  I think he and I are BFFs now.

Mike Green is really hot.  Like, super-duper hot.

pc300339I. Saw. Joe.  He looks just as awesome as I dreamed he would.

I also saw The Goose’s Roost sign, but the pictures didn’t turn out because I was too far away.

The Sabres’ power play is one of the shittiest things I have ever had the misfortune to lay  my eyes on.

I hope Lindy was serious when he said that he wasn’t just using “idle threats.”  I really want all the big players to get benched.  I want to send a message.

I really want the Sabres to start winning again.  I miss when they used to win.

But…um…you know what I miss most?

pc300362(getting Chris Clark in there was totally unintentional)

(and I swear, he was all over the place.  it was like watching Carey Price again)

P.S.  Well, now that I’ve seen him, I can try to get back to actual hockey content.  I realize that this place had kind of become Alex Ovechkin Central.

3 Comments »

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  1. Congrats on witnessing perfection! I know it was everything you dreamed of and then some!!

    “Chris Clark recognized me. I swear.”
    He probably did. They look in the stands and remember people. I know one that came up to some friends after a game at a bar and said ‘you’re the girls in section so and so…” They watch!

    I don’t know how close you were to Boudreau, but next time you see the Caps, check out his shoes. In Manchester and Hershey he used to wear two different shoes…on purpose.

    • In Manchester and Hershey he used to wear two different shoes…on purpose.
      has bruce made it his goal to make me love him as much as possible?!?
      and cari, HE was the one staring at me while I was furiously taking pictures of, um, other players. and he’s the one who somehow managed to skate into 90% of the pictures I ended up taking. even if he’s just off in the corner, you can see him.

  2. Later on I caught him looking again, and I waved every time he skated by. I think he and I are BFFs now.

    DON’T DO IT. PLEASE… It’s kind of tragic. I think I mockingly waved at Domi when he was in a trance-like stare while stretching, and I’m pretty sure I scared the shit out of him because he shook his head quickly then skated away. But then he did it again… Hmm… But anyways, it’s just creepy.


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