And Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend Is…

September 7, 2008 at 10:47 am | Posted in Frostee's Sabres Boyfriend, Paul Gaustad, Ryan Miller | Leave a comment

Scene: Frostee and Crunchy are sitting at a table at Panera’s.  There is an awkward silence.

Frostee:  So, thanks for agreeing to come here with me, Ryan.

Crunchy:  nods

Frostee:  So, uh, it’s too bad the Bulls lost last night.

Crunchy:  Yeah, too bad.

more awkward silence

Crunchy:  Frostee, I know I’m not going to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.

Frostee:  What?  Why do you say that?

Crunchy:  I just know.  And I don’t blame you for choosing Paul.  I know we have our history, and I thought that might count, but I guess it doesn’t.  

Frostee:  Ryan-

Crunchy:  You don’t have to make excuses.  I didn’t play well enough last year.  Paul can be your Sabres Boyfriend this year, and I can work to make myself more worthy of you.

Frostee:  But, no, don’t-

Crunchy:  And you don’t need to worry.  This won’t affect my friendship with Paul, and it won’t affect my friendship with you.  We can still-

Frostee:  CRUNCHY!

Crunchy:  Did you just call me Crunchy?  Why would you call me that?

Frostee:  Because you aren’t listening!  I didn’t pick Paul to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.

Crunchy:  You didn’t?

Frostee:  No, I didn’t.  But I was going to.

Crunchy:  What made you change your mind?

Frostee:  My phone was ringing so I walked into my bedroom where I left it.  On the way I my door, where there was a picture of you at the Winter Classic.  Then I turned to get my phone, and I saw The Wall, where there were there were pictures of you.  Then I saw my bulletin board, where there was another picture.  Later I turned on the laptop and saw the picture of Pie shooting on you during the warm-up at the Winter Classic.  Paul Gaustad might be the smart choice, but I don’t really feel like getting all new pictures and changing my desktop and buying a new shirt and everything.

Crunchy: grins  Oh.  Okay.

Frostee: (gives evil look)  But if you start sucking, I will break up with you and Paul will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.  Got it?

Crunchy:    Yes ma’am.  But can I ask you one question?

Frostee:  Sure!

Crunchy:  Why the hell did you call me Crunchy?

End Scene


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