The Fanatical Fan

A Gift From the Hockey Gods

You know what I am watching right now, Dear Readers?  The Senators/Penguins game.  For no apparent reason, we are getting NHL Network.  It is awesome. 

I have missed Sidney Crosby so much.  I have missed his semi-awkward, random interviews.  I have missed his unnaturally large thighs.  I about died laughing when he looked straight at the camera a minute ago.  He’s so hilarious.  And since this is the first time my mom has seen him being interviewed off the ice, she was very interested.

Mom:  How old is he?

Frostee:  He just turned 21.

Mom:  Where is he from?

Frostee:  Nova Scotia.  He says that everyone is so nice and you’ll make five new friends your first day there, guaranteed.

Mom:  Does he shave?

Frostee:  No.

Mom:  He has girl lips.

Frostee:  *dies laughing*

Mom:  Well, he seems very nice, but I think he’s a little effeminate.

Frostee:  I know!!!  That’s what I’ve always said!!!

Sidney:  [to paraphrase] Yeah, well, once more than one guy starts attacking me it’s kind of hard to defend myself.

Frostee:  That’s because he’s crying so hard.

I love hockey players so much.  You have no idea.

P.S. BGL and Petey are fighting on Friday.  You heard it here first.

P.P.S.  You’d think Gary Bettman would pay a few more people to come, especially if he wants to put NHL teams in Europe.  Gary Bettman is such a retard.

P.P.P.S. Is it just me, or is the ice surface huge?  

P.P.P.P.S.  I’m not talking about the Rangers/Lightning game.  Whatevs.  Now that Captain Whore is in charge, they’re gonna be some big bad team until they collapse in the ECF.  Sound familiar?

P.P.P.P.P.S.  From Frostee, With Love:

Dear Evgeni Malkin,

I like spaghetti too, but I am so over you.  Sorry.

Love,

Frostee

Dear Marc-Andre Fleury,

How are you?  I hope your summer was nice.  Mine was pretty good.  I missed you though.  FPBFE! (Frostee’s Playoff Boyfriend For Evah!)

Love,

Frostee

Dear Marty Gerber,

Dude, you kind of suck.  See ya in divisional match-ups this year!

Love,

Frostee