Since apparently Pommer decided to leave it up to his fucking AGENT, and refused to say a fucking thing about how negotiations are going, I have no choice but to blog about studying for Latin. Because the alternative is talking more about Sean Avery and his movie, but I really don’t feel like committing suicide. I have a quiz tomorrow, after all!
Now, to start off the school year Mrs. Curran has been reviewing declensions with us, and tomorrow we have a quiz on the first three of them. I really want to get a hundred, to hit the one year mark of my perfect streak in that class (I should tell you, I’m freakishly good in Latin. I don’t know why, and I don’t know how, but I am basically a beast in that class).
Let’s start with the first declension, shall we? How about we decline puella?!
I wrote the above line and got to dative singular before I realized how long it was going to take me to write it all out, and I still have to decide what to wear for my school picture tomorrow.
Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend doesn’t know what to expect on the Logic quiz on Friday, but he promises he won’t give up on Frostee if she does a sucky job, because she didn’t give up on him when he sucked ALL LAST SEASON.
I love how I can start a post talking about studying for Latin and end up looking through my Winter Classic photos and reminiscing and thinking about Crunchy. *swoons* Oh Crunchy, Crunchy, wherefore art thou Crunchy?
Yes, Dear Readers, it’s true. So anti-Ryan Miller is my father that he feels he must tell people (namely other Peterseseseses) that none other than Andrew Peters is Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend. Actually, he had a totally legitimate reason for doing it. See, today my dad hung out with Geoff Peters. By Geoff Peters I mean the brother of none other than our own Andrew Peters. I wanted to link you to his page on the Nashville Predators website, since he just signed with them, but it appears as though someone forgot to update the roster. I mean, why else would Petey not be there and Alexander Radulov still be listed? I thought the big bad wolf Russian hockey league gobbled him up signed him! But back to the story. My dad was hanging out with Petey and during the conversation mentioned how he had a teenaged daughter who was apeshit crazy for the Sabres (I think he actually said that I loved the Sabres lots and lots) and that his brother Andrew was my favorite. Apparently Petey had two responses, which my dad proceeded to text to me during my Guns, Germs, and Steel review.
Response One: ”Really? If I had known I would have brought her something!”
Response Two: ”Really? I thought teenaged girls usually went for Miller.”
Ha. I am such a cliche.
Papa Frostee reported that Geoff is actually really nice, and doesn’t at all look like a guy who would “rip your helmet off and punch your lights out,” which is reassuring. I like to think that Petey #2 is just as cuddly-looking as Petey #1.
And is it totally evil of me to admit that I smiled inside when I heard that the Master Douche, Tom Brady, is out for the season?
Scene: Frostee and Crunchy are sitting at a table at Panera’s. There is an awkward silence.
Frostee: So, thanks for agreeing to come here with me, Ryan.
Frostee: So, uh, it’s too bad the Bulls lost last night.
Crunchy: Yeah, too bad.
more awkward silence
Crunchy: Frostee, I know I’m not going to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
Frostee: What? Why do you say that?
Crunchy: I just know. And I don’t blame you for choosing Paul. I know we have our history, and I thought that might count, but I guess it doesn’t.
Crunchy: You don’t have to make excuses. I didn’t play well enough last year. Paul can be your Sabres Boyfriend this year, and I can work to make myself more worthy of you.
Frostee: But, no, don’t-
Crunchy: And you don’t need to worry. This won’t affect my friendship with Paul, and it won’t affect my friendship with you. We can still-
Crunchy: Did you just call me Crunchy? Why would you call me that?
Frostee: Because you aren’t listening! I didn’t pick Paul to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
Crunchy: You didn’t?
Frostee: No, I didn’t. But I was going to.
Crunchy: What made you change your mind?
Frostee: My phone was ringing so I walked into my bedroom where I left it. On the way I my door, where there was a picture of you at the Winter Classic. Then I turned to get my phone, and I saw The Wall, where there were there were pictures of you. Then I saw my bulletin board, where there was another picture. Later I turned on the laptop and saw the picture of Pie shooting on you during the warm-up at the Winter Classic. Paul Gaustad might be the smart choice, but I don’t really feel like getting all new pictures and changing my desktop and buying a new shirt and everything.
Crunchy: grins Oh. Okay.
Frostee: (gives evil look) But if you start sucking, I will break up with you and Paul will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend. Got it?
Crunchy: Yes ma’am. But can I ask you one question?
Crunchy: Why the hell did you call me Crunchy?
This is the final round in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
Just in case you were wondering, Nathan Gerbe and I are now facebook friends. I know you’re all jealous.
Goose and Crunchy. Crunchy and Goose. Both wonderful players, wonderful people. How the hell am I supposed to choose?
Let’s see. They’re both charitable. Crunchy has the Steadfast Foundation and visits kids in Roswell, which is so great. Goose has the Green Team, which I am a member of, and is fighting childhood obesity and is trying to get kids to read. I LOVE reading, Goose! They’re both American, so I won’t have to worry about visa issues in the future. Major props to Paul for having his middle name listed on his Wikipedia page (it’s Michael. Isn’t that so cute? Paul Michael Gaustad!), but I couldn’t tell you what Ryan Miller’s is. Paul was born in Fargo. That’s pretty sweet. Ryan hails from East Lansing, Michigan. We all know how he went to Michigan State (where my cousin went, and even met her husband), and won the Hobey Baker, which is awesome. He comes from a major hockey family, whereas Paul Gaustad had no business making it in the NHL but is now a key part on our team. It’s pretty safe to say they’re both cultured, since they took a trip together to Europe this summer. Ryan Miller has The Refinery, a clothing story (I died laughing when I first heard about it), a somewhat questionable taste in clothes, and an annual fashion show (if it wasn’t for the 21 age cutoff, I would have gone this year, so I’m a little pissed about that. I need to get me a fake ID for next year). On the rare occasions when he isn’t giving his death glare, it even seems like he may have a good sense of humor! Paul Gaustad is…well…Paul Gaustad. Isn’t much else I can say about that.
I know that Ryan Miller has a girlfriend in Chicago, but since I was wondering about Paul’s relationship status, I went to the place where I go for all my hockey player gossip needs, Talk-Sports.net. Apparently he was in a relationship for 5 or 6 years, but they broke up because of some sort of commitment issues. I was going to look for more details but I saw that Ovie’s had been updated recently, so I had to hurry on over to there. I love the picture on the top, of him and the ice cream. I also can’t decide if I should look up that music video later on when it’s done. Is that something I really want to see?
By now I’ve determined that both Paul and Ryan are pure of heart and that while Ryan is supposedly in a relationship with someone in Chicago (in his blog post where he mentioned that and then said how Chicago is his favorite place in the summer, I went into full-on freakout mode. I was so afraid he would sign with the Blackhawks instead), Paul is single. We also know that they both love Wegman’s, because people see him in the prepared food section all the time, and I actually cut out a quote from the paper last fall where Ryan said how people were coming up to him in Wegman’s and telling him that it would be okay. It’s on The Wall right next to the quote of Ovie talking about wanting to win the Stanley Cup.
Their playing skills: For two years Crunchy was ridiculously badass, and then he started sucking this year. I really don’t know how he’ll be this year, but I’m hoping that when he says he won’t get as tired out, he means it. Goose just kind of rocks. He’s a big guy who’s important on the Power Play. I can’t remember any recent times when he sucked.
While I do base most of my reasons for loving hockey players on who the are on the inside or on the ice (hence my love for Alexander Ovechkin), their looks do come into play. Let’s take a look at last year’s headshots, shall we?
*sigh* Oh, Crunchy. I’m not quite sure what to say. When you’re wearing a hat, you’re actually pretty damn hot. And when Chris Simpson interviewed you at the Rangers/Penguins game during the playoffs last year, you looked downright sexy. But this picture doesn’t really catch you from your best angle. First of all, how many times do I have to tell you that combing your hair back is NOT how you should be wearing it? I’m sick of reminding you that when you comb your manbangs down over your forehead, you actually look great. Then there’s the whole issue of your wonky brow. I personally think it’s adorable, and my 86 year-old grandma, who is crazy in love with you, thinks your just all around ridiculously hot, but others, like my mother, think it’s the most hideous thing since the Phantom took off his mask. And while this picture may not show it, we all know just how skinny you are, and I think even I would feel majorly obese next to you. I do appreciate how you always smile, though.
It may seem at this point like Paul Gaustad is the obvious choice. He’s hotter, he’s eco-friendly, and he doesn’t make me tear my hair out during hockey games. Sure Ryan Miller has a DELCICIOUS ice cream, and a bobblehead, but Little Ryan does not have a very good track record here. Paul Gaustad clearly has what it takes to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
There’s only one thing standing in the way of me choosing him, and that’s my history with Ryan Miller. Sure, now I’m crazy obsessed with Alex Ovechkin, and I LOVE Patrick Kane, and Sidney Crosby makes me laugh, but all this crazy-obsessive love stems back to Ryan Miller. He was the first player I was ever crazy obsessed with, and he’s the first player I ever truly loved. He was the player I would gush over when we were talking about hockey, and a Miller t-shirt is the first player shirt I ever bought. Sure, NOW it seems like it should be Paul Gaustad, but a year ago? Ryan Miller, all the way.
Since I’m taking this way too seriously, I need to think things over (and start reading Shakespeare. I’m way behind). Tomorrow I’ll name Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
This is the sixteenth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
The bad news: I still have a ton of homework and upcoming tests.
The good news: I basically got permission from the mom unit to drop the advanced orchestra I don’t want to be in, and depending on how efficient I am I might be able to take those THREE HOURS I’m supposed to spend practicing each week and use it to post. Let’s keep our fingers crossed.
This is the last cut before I get to the final round! Aren’t you all so excited?
Two reasons why you can’t be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend:
(1) You’re just a wee bit too teenybopper for me. I realize that I am a teenaged girl and therefore should be writing you love letters and fantasizing about spending the rest of my life with you, but I’m not. You’re ADORABLE, with your cute grin, and as a friend of my dad’s put it, your “balding at 25 head,” but I just don’t see us being able to sustain a deep, passionate relationship. I think if I ever wanted to go to go to the movies (but no R-rated ones) or hang out, you would be the one to call, and I think you would be very trustworthy as a designated driver, and when Pkane and I get married you are SO going on the guest list, but as Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend, I’m just not so sure.
(2) Last time I checked, Jason, you were still a Restricted Free Agent. I have NO idea what is taking so long, but I need security. I can’t just fall in love with a guy who’s going to flee for another team as soon as the season is over. You need to sign a contract, Jason. That’s just the way it is.
This weekend, in between reading Shakespeare and history textbooks and seeing the new Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants movie, I will compare the two remaining guys and finally choose who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend. If you’ve been paying attention, you’ll know that the two remaining contestants are none other than Mr. Goose and Mr. Crunchy. Who will come out when these two charitable, hard-working pals are compared? Stay tuned to find out!
This is the fifteenth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will get to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
My day pretty much sucked, so I am going to pretend it didn’t happen. I will say this, however: the Islanders have a better chance of winning the Stanley Cup this year than I have of posting every day. I had 27 minute classes today because of assemblies and I still had an hour of homework. I’m still aiming to name Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend over the weekend, but for now, another cut:
You may think I am a cold, cold girl for cutting Teppo Numminen, but actually, it is the opposite. I love Teppo. He’s attractive, he’s a sexy veteran, and the whole heart valve-replacement thing made me want to care for him. I am cutting Teppo Numminen because I know that while he would graciously accept being named Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend, deep down in that healing heart of his, he would know he could never truly love me. I am not cutting Teppo Numminen, rather setting him free; he may now be free to try and woo Corinne, and good friend of mine. While she sees him as old and stupid, he loves her with a passion not seen often. I am cutting him so that he may do whatever he feels he must to make her love him back. I could never hold back a man who feels such pure love to someone I care about. Being the hopeless romantic I am, I find his devotion amazing.
I wish you the best of luck, Teppo. I know that someday Corinne will realize just how lucky she would be to have you.
BTW, I finally got a Facebook yesterday, and I just invited Nathan Gerbe to be my friend. I know you are all jealous of how cool I am.
This is the fourteenth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
Happy Birthday, ARM! Aw, is that for me? How sweet!
I’m not even talking about school starting tomorrow. I don’t see why it has to start now. It’s technically still summer. And all my honors classes are killing the environment, between the 175 index cards for vocab, the 60 pages of notes, and the packet of guided reading questions. I am a member of the Green Team, you know. I should protest, or boycott or something.
I’m thinking Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend will be named over the weekend. I just checked the page in my English notebook that I was using to keep track of all the players (because it would be so like me to name Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend and then realize two weeks later I forgot to cut Tim Connolly), and it should work out that way. I wonder who it could be!! Today’s cut:
Ah, Royzie. It’s not because of Petey, I promise. If you want to run around with a married guy, that’s fine. Who am I to judge?
See, you’re just too…perfect. Off the ice, I mean. We need to get rid of that diving reputation on the ice. Back to off the ice, though. You always look so put together, with your perfectly gelled hair, and your clothes, and your environment-killing car.
And I get the feeling that if I asked you if I looked fat in something (as opposed to Seveteen Magazine’s preferred inquiry of “How hot does this make me look?”), you would be honest, instead of telling me I look great.
Score lots of goals, Royzie. And buy a blue Prius, for goodness sake.
This is the thirteenth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
I can NOT talk about Gossip Girl. I just can’t. It was horrible. Dan and Serena got back together (for now), Serena’s grandma was being all nice (for now), Nate is screwing a married woman (for now), and Blair is being a first-rate BITCH to Chuck. My heart was breaking for him last night. I was borderline crying. Chuck, get over Blair. I can heal your wounded heart. As for One Tree Hill: Oh. My. GOD! I screamed for a solid 60 seconds after Peyton showed up in the airport. Woohooo!!! And Psycho Nanny definitely beats out Psycho Derek for winning the Creepiest Character EVER. I’m really scared for Brooke and Nathan. He’s going to end up back in a wheelchair, and Brooke looked really hurt in the clips from next week’s episode. Yikes.
And I am so pissed at my school. Why the hell are they doing Homecoming so late? It’s Columbus Day Weekend, for God’s sake! I just realized this morning that not only am I missing the Capitals/Blackhawks game Saturday night (because as much as I love hockey, I can’t exactly skip Homecoming for it), which I was really excited for, but I’m missing the Sabres/Canadiens game on Friday! I am missing the first game of the 2008-09 Buffalo Sabres Season! All because of the stupid Powder Puff game! It’s not like I can miss the Powder Puff game. I’ve been going since eighth grade. How am I going to know if I chose the right guy to be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend?!?! Ugh.
Petey, you are where I go when I need a laugh. You’re like the comic relief on the team. When everyone else is all “the sky is falling,” you’re like, “yeah, Royzie can’t say ‘filet mignon’ right.” I can not risk screwing up our friendship by making you my Sabres Boyfriend. And things are all annoying around here, so I don’t need all your emotional drama right now. You have a wife, Derek Roy, and possibly even Crunchy (Come on. You saw the two of them on that cute Happy New Year thing they did at the Winter Classic.), you don’t really need to be my Sabres Boyfriend right now.
And, of course, Corinne might kill me.
This is the twelfth round of cuts in a series where I decide who will be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
(1) Last night, my dad threatened Little Ryan, after we had decided that the Sabres have what it takes to be second in the division as long as you-know-who delivers. Little Ryan was warned that we’ve put him out on the deck in the snow before, and we aren’t afraid to do it again. Mini Alex just nodded in agreement.
(2) I decided that while Ovie-in-a-speedo is pretty nice, it will never, ever beat Darling Michael-in-a-speedo.
(4) I may or may not have included the above items for the sole reason of me being able to look at more pictures of Michael Phelps.
For today’s cuts, I’m going to do something different. As you may know, the Sabres have signed quite a few players to fill out the roster in Rohester Portland since I started this competition. Since they are technically members of the Buffalo Sabres, they are eligible to become Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend.
The following players have been cut from the competition to become Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend:
Sorry, guys. I don’t really go for your types.
Hell yeah! This is more like it! Not only does it mean that hockey is almost here, it also makes me realize that the Sabres aren’t totally screwed! Note to Royzie and Vanek: You guys rock. Just keep doing what you do best, and Vanek, leave the fighting and toughness to guys who know how to do it. (But no, this does not mean I’ll put you back in the FSB competition. You betrayed me, and I don’t forget betrayal.)
Oh, Patty. I love you so much. This is hard for me. You bring an element of toughness that this team needs, and your first NHL fight was against my favorite pain-in-the-ass-spleen, Sean Avery. You’re adorable, you went to St. Franny’s (and therefore should be my enemy, but how could I hate you?), you’re a B-lo boy, Adam Mair takes care of you, it’s all wonderful! (Actually, here at TFF Headquarters we want to see a Youtube video of you and Adam talking about how he watches over you, a la Andrew Peters and Derek Roy)
That being said, I have two reasons why you can not be Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend:
(1) You are still involved with Rochester Portland, and it’s hard to tell people that your Sabres Boyfriend is chillin’ up in Portland. Whenever you come hang with the Sabres, I always tell people you are my favorite Sabre (I think you and Crunchy were tied last year for being Frostee’s One Night Stand the most. Thomas Vanek was a close second, during the second half of the season). I’m just not sure how a long-distance relationship would work.
(2) Whenever I google image search you, this picture comes up. (And leads back to here, apparently.) Thing is, that picture makes me like Evgeni Malkin less and less, and, of course, there’s the whole issue of me going temporarily blind every time I see it. Put that thing away, Evgeni. There are children on the internet.