Patrick Kaleta interrupted an Adam Mair joke when he scored. Thanks, kiddo.
I watched about five minutes of that game and everyone who saw the whole thing confirmed that it was really boring.
Ryan was so cute on The Today Show. We done good, Buffalo.
The Caps are no longer undefeated at home this year, but at least they got a point after Varly just sort of rolled over and died.
Mama O ACTUALLY CUT Alex’s hair. I missed the first two periods so I thought that was just the running joke, BUT NO. That’s great. Really great. She should just get props for actually holding him down long enough to cut it, because all the guys I know do not like it when their moms whip out the scissors.
Um, Adam Mair got traded. That came out of nowhere. Darcy, are you up to something? Are there plots being plotted? I sincerely hope so, because I always sort of liked Adam and just waiving him for the sake of waiving him makes me sad. I realize that now that Danny is gone and he didn’t have to babysit him anymore there really wasn’t any point in keeping him around, but still. Best of luck in the world, Adam. I hope you find a loving home somewhere.
In other news:
- The Catwalk for Charity was last night. I’ve already seen lots of pictures, and it looked like a lot of fun. Christopher never fails to make me love him. Tyler looked adorable with the puppy. Paul looked kind of drunk. Maybe he is human after all!
- Butthead that he is, Alex thought he’d be all funny and freak me out and say he’d be 4-5 weeks. So not funny, Alex. And it only reinforced my belief that your sense of humor is lame.
- Everyone I know who was at the games over the weekend said they were even worse in person. That scares me. Sabres, let’s fix things for Wednesday night. Remember when you scored ten goals against the Oilers last year? That was tons of fun.
- Totally unrelated, but that was the same night Chara tried to kill Alex. There’s a freak-out in the post I linked above.
I have some bad news, kiddies: tomorrow I go back to school. Yeah. I know. It’s nauseating. I even tried waking up early today to beat the jetlag I’ll have tomorrow morning, and it didn’t work. Alarm went off at seven, I dragged myself out of bed at eight. There’s no way six a.m. is happening tomorrow.
I’m sorta looking forward to going back to school, but my schedule is hellish this year. So, the thing is, I might not be able to blog every day, and even if I do the posts might be, um, short and sweet. Who knows. Just don’t worry that I’ve abandoned this blog. I haven’t. I just have six papers, two books, and 40 math equations calling my name.
And I’m also trying to get my act together and start a post previewing the Sabres season for this weekend, so we’ll see how that goes.
But that’s all later. For now…
- Adam Mair had hip surgery and he’s out at least six weeks. Awesomesauce. I suppose this will open up the roster for the 364 other forwards we have, but it could pose a problem when Mair comes back if whoever filled in for him is playing well. Good luck, Darcy! I’m sure you’ll get this all figured out!
- Drew Stafford still isn’t signed. I’m 100% on the fence about this. And I have this nagging feeling that we don’t even have cap space to sign him. (I’m just too lazy to look the numbers up.) And it’s not like Jerry Sullivan sold me on keeping him vs. not keeping him in his column last Sunday.
- There’s still construction going on at my school and I don’t think I can get to my homeroom/2 classes/my locker. I can live without the two classes, but I need a locker.
- Mike Green has a new website. It’s a complete hot mess. Michael, you’re such a poser. His blog is so painfully awkward. It’s times like these that make me wonder WHAT I could POSSIBLY SEE in him.
- Michael also got a Twitter. It’s definitely not as bad as the website. As of this posting there’s only one tweet, but I really appreciate how Michael showed his enthusiasm for life with about a hundred exclamation points.
- The great (inter)national mystery that is the search for the meaning of Alexander’s tramp stamp might have reached its conclusion. I swore to never speak of his body art EVER AGAIN but I changed my mind. They’re both partially covered because he’s wearing pants, but according to Hanzi Smatter, the one means “one family” and the other one means “life.” Wow, Alex. That’s…really sweet. But couldn’t you have put them anywhere else on your body?
I think that’s it for now. Enjoy yourself, kids……..peace.
Scene: Frostee is sitting at the dinner table with her family on Monday night. Kieffer the dog barks to go out.
Frostee’s Brother: NOSES!!
Everyone scrambles to touch their noses.
Frostee: HA! Ben, you’re last. Go let the dog out.
Frostee’s Mom (trying to avoid a conflict): Whoever lets him out, the other lets him in.
Frostee and Frostee’s Brother stare each other down before they both leap from their chairs and dash through the kitchen. After rounding the corner into the front hall, Frostee’s Brother throws Frostee to the ground (essentially pushing her over the dog, who got rather excited) and runs to the front door.
Frostee: OH MY GOD MY LEG. I THINK IT’S BROKEN!! (Frostee limps back to the kitchen table and gently touches the huge lump already forming on her shin)
Frostee’s Dad: How many times do I say you’re not supposed to skate blindly into the corner with your head down? Someone’s going to come and hit you one of these days.
Frostee: I could have broken the dog’s leg, and I can’t even put any weight on my leg. Aren’t you going to do something?!?!
Frostee’s Dad: You need to learn to protect yourself from hits.
Frostee’s Brother: I didn’t do anything. I never even touched her.
Frostee (under her breath): Yeah, and Sid didn’t punch a guy in the balls when they played Atlanta. Dad, why don’t you punish him?!!? (sniffles) At least give him two minutes for cross-checking?
Frostee’s Dad: You know how it is. If the ref didn’t see it, it didn’t happen.
Just for the record, I could hardly put my Ugg on this morning.
Sabres and Senators tonight. Captain Craig is back in the lineup, Max is out, Teppo has been stricken ill. (Chris Butler didn’t start making him lunch every day when he heard Rivet was coming back, did he? Perhaps we should look into this…) The Senators are fantastically terrible, but I don’t trust the Sabres. I absolutely love them for that exciting, nerve-racking win over Boston on Saturday, but it would be just like them to get all cocky and just assume they could easily beat the Senators. And then lose, 7-1. So you hear me, Sabres? Don’t assume anything. Be a good team. Work your asses off out there. Don’t get cocky. Just play your game.
Dear Adam Mair,
If you wanted to fight Jarkko (or Chris Neil, for that matter), I wouldn’t be totally against it. I’m kind of in the mood for a good hockey fight after all that bongo-playing we were treated to over the weekend.
Just in case anyone was wondering, the only part I saw of the Versus game last night was when they were interviewing Hank after the game. I may hate the Rangers, but I positively love Henrik Lundqvist.
I feel as though I have neglected them a bit over the past few days, so now I’m going to talk about the Sabres, and the Sabres only. (I thought it would be a good idea to get myself in a foul mood before going to watch “The Deer Hunter” for my school project.)
- Nobody told me last night that Pkaleta was going to miss at least three more weeks! Nooo!!! We were just saying during the second period last night that the Sabres could use Patty K back in the lineup. We need his spunk and hits.
We need PK back in the lineup and healthy. Stat.
- I just got around to watching the post-game interviews. Thomas Vanek’s was okay; he was definitely right when he said the Sabres play better when he plays better. It was nice seeing Ryan Miller talk about how he needs to step it up (’cause, um, Crunchy? You kind of sucked last night), and I enjoyed when he starting getting on the media’s case about quotes of his. Heh. Paul Gaustad’s interview was so good that I actually watched it twice. Paul was angry and he was embarrassed and he thought that the effort was “unacceptable.” Hear, hear, Paul! He was right when he said that it’s everyone’s job to hit, not just his. He looked quite pissed. I hope he kicked everyone’s ass after the media left. I don’t know what to do with Jason Pominville. I used to love his adorableness and innocence. Now I kind of want to throw him off the roof. I couldn’t even read his blog without gagging. Seriously, Jason? YOU NEED TO STEP IT UP. YOU NEED TO START SCORING. Maybe we need to tell him that if he scores lots of goals the unicorns will come back?!?! ANYTHING at this point. I can’t believe I wanted him to be captain this year. My new vote for captain is Mr. Gaustad. He’s one of the only players who actually seems to care about winning. He’d make a much better captain than Rivet.
- Times must be bad when even the penalty kill is sucky. I couldn’t believe the Sabres let the Caps score TWICE with a man-advantage. (Although the Backstrom goal, which was right in front of us, was actually a very, very nice goal. I wish the Sabres could score goals like that)
- I’m looking forward to seeing who Lindy scratches. I want Jochen scratched, definitely. I feel almost blasphemous saying it, but Pommer could use a night off too. Staffy could probably sit again, and maybe even (I’m sorry Cari!) Derek. And Jaro. And Teppo. And Hank. For the first 59 minutes last night I would have said Clarke too, but since he scored I guess he’ll stay. Maybe Lindy should just bring up the rest of the Portland Pirates and have them play a night. It might knock some sense into the Sabres.
- The power play needs some serious work. I don’t know what, but Darcy and Lindy need to do something. They need to get someone good to quarterback the PP. They need someone on the point who can actually keep the puck in. They need to stop passing the puck around and just shoot. Look at the Caps’ power play. All they do is shoot. You know, someone should tell the Sabres that one of the reasons Alex is currently the second highest scorer in the league is that he always SHOOTS THE PUCK. If Pommer shot more, I bet he could score. If Jochen and Derek shot more, I bet they could too. I hate bringing up that obnoxiously cheesy quote of Wayne Gretzky’s, but the guy knew what he was talking about when he said that you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. IT’S TRUE, SABRES. WHEN YOU DON’T SHOOT THE PUCK, THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN SCORE.
- I really do believe that the Sabres have some talented players, but someone needs to teach them to start acting like it. Remember last year? Derek was pretty darn good last year. Even Pommer looked pretty good out there. Is it all mental with them? Is there some sort of block in their brain keeping them from playing well? We need to hire some sort of psychologist to get in their heads and figure out what the hell is wrong with them.
- I didn’t pay much attention to the Sabres during warmup last night, and while we all know one of the reasons, there’s another. I noticed it in November, and I noticed it again last night. The Capitals look good even when they’re warming up. The drills they do, and the passing, and the puck-handling. All of it. They look like a good team out there before the game even starts. (One player in particular was absolutely mesmerizing with the puck before the puck even dropped, but I won’t mention him. This post is supposed to be about how much the Sabres suck.)
- And is it just me, or are all of the Sabres incredibly slow skaters? Good grief. It looked like they were trying to navigate through molasses at some times last night.
- Adam Mair scored the first goal for the Sabres last night. It was actually a really nice goal. The thing is, Adam Mair shouldn’t be the one scoring that kind of goal. Thomas Vanek should. Roy should. Pommer should. When Adam Mair, Matt Ellis, and Paul Gaustad are out against Ovechkin, Backstrom, and Kozlov, there is something wrong.
- At this point in the season, I don’t think the Sabres will make the playoffs. If they do, it’ll be a last minute eighth seed, which would (most likely) mean Boston, which would most likely be very embarrassing.
Well, that’s all I have to complain about for now. Have a happy and safe New Year’s Eve, everyone, and we’ll see you tomorrow for The Stupid Fucking Ice Bowl, Take Two!
(Um, I Just Thought I Should Let You Know That I Am A Major Drama Queen And Therefore I’ve Been Seriously Milking This Whole, “Ovie might not be at the hockey game that I asked for tickets to in May because his grandfather is sick” Thing. But I Still Am Really Sad)October 29, 2008 at 4:06 pm | Posted in Adam Mair, Alex Ovechkin, Bills, Patrick Kaleta, Paul Gaustad, Randomness, Ryan Miller | 2 Comments
You guys are all kind of lucky that you don’t go to school with me/hang out with me after school/live with me, because then you’d have to listen to me walking around all day moaning about how my true love is in Russia. I’ve actually been coming up with some very witty lines to describe how I’ve been felling (“I am Juliet and he is my Romeo, banished to Mantua. No, wait, I mean Moscow), but I’m only kidding when I say every thirty seconds that I plan on killing myself on Saturday if he’s not back.
While I may be exaggerating a wee bit, that doesn’t mean that when we were talking about Muscovite mica, I just smiled and grinned. I got all sad and quiet. It’s probably hilarious for anyone else to watch.
All right. Well, now that I’ve gotten “I miss Ovie” out of my system, I should be good for about 20 minutes before I start getting sad again. So, a few things I wasn’t able to say on Monday or yesterday:
- Um, kind of delayed, but what was up with the Bills on Sunday? That game was…very unpleasant.
- Sabres, I’m still totally pissed at you for losing to Ottawa. That was absolutely terrible. I won’t be watching the game tomorrow night, since I can’t skip religion for hockey twice in a row, but that doesn’t mean you can suck. I’d actually appreciate it if the opposite happened.
- If anyone has sent me an email in the last 48 hours, I haven’t gotten it. The family laptop decided to crap out again and we had to erase the memory to get it working again, but since everything was backed up this time it isn’t that much of a problem. We just have to re-set the wireless internet and mailboxes (seriously though, Dear Readers, invest in a Time Machine for your Macbooks. Because I am speaking from experience when I tell you that losing 1000 pictures and 600 songs is not fun).
- Whoa, Adam Mair!
- Goose is playing tomorrow night! *sounds of rejoicing*
- Twihard figured out yesterday that Patrick Kane plays for the Blackhawks, not the Sabres. We are really, really proud of her.
- We’re going to the memorial thing tonight at Roswell for my grandma, and I am trying to figure out what the chances of Ryan Miller being there are. He is, after all, very involved at Roswell.
- *sighs* Is Alex back from Russia yet?
Um, I really don’t like afternoon hockey games. They really bug me. I like hockey games on nights when I don’t have school the next day. I like curling up on the coach in my pajamas, not sitting at the desk trying to do homework and crane my neck at the TV at the same time.
Ah, Kevin Sylvester. How I have missed you. The pregame show is on, and I am loving the messy-haired Crunchy interview. I have this weird love of players with messy, sweaty, post-game hair. I find it adorable.
Lalime is getting his start this afternoon. I’m not sure if I should be worried or not. He was pretty solid in the preseason. I’m also not sure if I want Rick to play or not. I wouldn’t mind getting Mr. Back-up if it meant getting to see Ricky without his helmet. They don’t call him Pretty Ricky for nothing.
Okay, time to work on my Robert Mugabe research. I’ll update with thoughts at each intermission. Let’s Go Buffalo!!!
Hmm, sounds like Lindy doesn’t like afternoon games either. That’s pretty cool.
So is spaghetti for breakfast! Jealous!
P.S. Clare, thank you so much for the picture! I LOVE it!!! Reader Award to you!
First Period 1-0, Sabres
(These are basically my thoughts on the period as it was happening. There is NOTHING on Mugabe’s thoughts on African tribes online)
- Whoa, Jochen Hecht! You badass. Sabres score on the man advantage! 1-0.
- Geez, Mike. And just when I thought Hilary had made you go soft. Leave our boyz alone. (I think it’s hilarious that Mike Comrie was the highest scorer on the Islanders last year)
- Ugh. Just when I thought the Sabres’ power play was getting better, they don’t score in another four minute man advantage. Nice job, Boyz.
End of period thoughts: Lalime has looked solid from all the way back here in the kitchen, and it hasn’t sounded like the Sabres have been doing anything too bone-headed. Time to register for Survey Savvy, then we can start the next period!
Guys, there wasn’t anything uber-important in that Darcy Regier interview, was there? I was too busy eating a banana to listen.
Second Period 5-0 Sabres
- Ehmagod I totally love Adam Mair!!! 2-0, Sabres!!! (McDonald, that was absolutely terrible)
- You know what? Screw working on my book project. Word is being a retard (or, as Gena likes to put it, a “fucktard”) and the project isn’t even due until the 27th. I’m just going to watch some good ol’ hockey.
- Dear Readers, I don’t know about you, but I think Patrick Lalime has been looking very trustworthy thus far. Wouldn’t it be so nice if we all didn’t have to freak out about our back-up this year?
- Whatevs, Al. Just take a penalty. At least I get to see “Kaltsy” now! (I’ve decided that I like Pkaleta on the PK. It’s almost as nice as Ovie on the PK)
- 15 shorties, Islanders? Wow. You guys really do suck.
- THOMAS VANEK PUTS A SHORTIE HOME! WOOO!!! 3-0, SABRES!!! The verdict is in, Dear Readers: Frostee is starting to develop a soft spot for Thomas Vanek. What the hell is up with this?
- POPULATION OF POMINVILLE HAS MOVED UP AGAIN!! POMMERDOODLING!!!!!! 4-0 Sabres!
- Yet another reason why I love Pkaleta. Did you see that body slam?!?! And Craig Rivet, I do not appreciate your attempts at making me love you.
- Adam Mair, you are an OUTRAGEOUS BADASS.
- EEE now Teppo is being all sexy and captain-y as he fills in for Rivet. And I feel so bad for Petey! He was stuck on the bench when the fight started! (My dad is at work and texted me to find out what happened in the fight and he asked “Omg! Wheres Petey?”)
- Um, who is the blood from? Because that’s really gross. I hope the B-lo Boyz are okay!!!
- What the HELL. I am totally in love with Thomas Vanek. This is so annoying. Thomas, if you score more goals that Ovie this year, you die. 5-0 Sabres!!!
- I just missed the last two minutes of play because I was discussing meeting Ovie with my dad. He thinks Dr. Bisson won’t be able to get me in to meet the Capitals, since it’s the Capitals. I told him to ask if I could meet the Sabres, and then I could go into the Capitals room and pretend I was dyslexic/illiterate. Because sometimes I think I am dyslexic/illiterate.
- Mairsy is back! And yes, I did just reenact the Kaleta body slam for my dad. This will be so much easier when we have DVR.
- Um, why is Thompson going to the dressing room? I’m really confused. Maybe I should stop messing around on Facebook and just watch the game.
- Spacek’s in the sin bin. Delay of game penalties are lame.
- Gosh darn it, Pommer. I wanted you to score there!!! (Wouldn’t two shorties be so awesomely kickass?)
- Fuck. Did I just hear that Paille is hurt? Fuck.
- Wait, I’m confused. Do the Islanders want to lose?
- Good grief. Mike Comrie, what are we going to do with you? *shakes head*
- Wait, Paille appears to be okay. He’s sitting up on the bench and everything. Phew.
- Dammit, Thomas! Why are you making me love you so much!!
- And now we are treated to “sensitive” Al Kotalik. Awww.
Third Period. Final score: 7-1 Sabres.
But first, a few more thoughts from the intermission report:
- Did Kevin Sylvester just say that Adam Mair has an upper body injury? Because, you know, that’s not very good.
- Craig Rivet might not play on Wednesday?!!? The Rangers are undefeated! We need Rivet!! No!!!
Okay, third period stuff now:
- Ehmagod Crunchy just walked by!! He’s got his skull cap on!! Yay!!!
- My sudden squealing problem is even more concerning than my new-found love of Thomas Vanek.
- Whoa, Harry. She’s probably young enough to be your daughter.
- My brother just asked why it says that it’s the second period. Geez. Get it right, guys.
- WOOO!!! Kotalik sends it home on the 5-on-3! 6-0 Sabres!!
- Whoa, Tony Romo is out for four weeks with a broken pinkie! Ahahaha. He has a broken pinkie.
- Ah, fudge. I was hoping for a Lalime shutout. But the Islanders and their fans don’t actually think that the Islanders are going to make some miracle comeback and win now, do they?
- Al’s in the sin bin? Why?
- And Vanek’s going for goaltender interference? You know what is the most concerning about all this? I don’t feel a burning desire to cut of Thomas’s head for taking a penalty. I just want to hug him and tell him that it’s okay. I do not like this, Dear Readers. I do not like this one bit.
- GOAL!!! That was a GORGEOUS play, Clarke. Gorgeous. And it’s good to see that Paille is okay!! 7-1 Sabres.
- Oh my God, they’re playing the Spongebob theme song. I’m not gonna lie, that’s totally awesome.
- Petey just got a roughing, but so did some Isle. Oh, Petey.
- I’m starting to remember how much I loved the music they play at Nassau Coliseum. Now they’re playing “Welcome to the Black Parade”
- Is it just me, or has this game gotten slightly boring? There are only three minutes left and there appears to be a lot of skating up and down the ice.
- Oh, no, wait, Mair just got slashed. I guess he doesn’t have an upper body injury, then!
- What the HELL is up with the Islander’s mascot? It’s like some sort of dragon or something.
- 146 penalty minutes, eh? Good. I kind of like hockey fights. Not stupid, “we don’t really know how to fight so we’re just going to hug each other for a really long time” fights, but real, sticking up for your teammates, tough guy fights. And fights with the Pkaleta Body Slam.
- OMG I LOVE “What I’ve Done”!!! Can the Sabres play all of their games in Nassau Coliseum? Because not only will they win, we will get to hear awesome music.
- Who are the Islanders kidding? They’re gonna win the first draft pick in June. You heard it here first.
- EEE Crunchy!!! Happy Crunchy!!
- Seriously, Kevin? ”It was probably harder than it looked?” This is probably one of the easiest wins I’ve ever seen.
- Dear Readers, I love Lindy Ruff. He is the awesomest coach. I can’t believe this is the first post filed in my new “Lindy Ruff” category.
- Is it just me, or did Lalime look like Crunchy in that first shot of him? that kind of spooky. Speaking of guys that look like Crunchy, we decided that Ryan Gosling kind of looks like a wonky brow-less him.
- Ehmagod, I love Patrick Lalime. He’s adorable and well-spoken.
- Shit I was just thinking dreamily of Patrick Lalime and missed who they said might be out with an injury. Who is it?? I’m panicking!!
I’m just going to have to find out who’s hurt later. Now I have to go shower so that after my lesson is over I can watch the Caps!!
That was an awesome game, I’m not going to lie. If the Sabres beat the Rangers on Wednesday, I think I will go crazy.
I can’t believe they’re undefeated!! *squeals more*
Hecht is hurt? Hecht?!?! No!!!!! Yo-yo!!
So since it’s Friday and we had early dismissal I actually had a chance to BREATHE this afternoon, before I dove into the shitload of homework I have, I downloaded the Media Guide. I have to say, overall, there weren’t too many surprising things in there. Everyone loves chicken and rice/pasta, U2 and DMB are amazing, their parents are the most influential people in their lives, and they’ve been playing hockey forever. A few notes from my quick read-through:
- Tim Connolly is smiling. I…I just don’t understand that. And apparently he would own a winery if he wasn’t a hockey player. (I really liked seeing what a few of the players would be doing if they weren’t hockey players)
- WTF, Pkaleta? Kaltsy? Kaltsy? That is the most RANDOM nickname I have ever heard. I’m going to agree with Anne and just assume that the players just take part of their name and add -sy. But I still think Kaltsy is the most retarded nickname ever.
- I think it’s really cute that all Patrick Lalime had to say about himself is that he and his wife, Marie-Helene, have two daughters whose names are Liliana and Rosemary. They sound like names of elves in the Inheritance Trilogy Cycle (which, by the way, I finished. :’( The first 600 pages were terrible, but the last 200 made up for it, in my opinion).
- Tony Lydman’s picture is, well, classic Toni Lydman.
- Clarke MacArthur’s picture makes my kind of wonder why I thought he was so hot last year. His hair, it’s just so…ew.
- Adam Mair basically wants to STEAL MY HEART (sorry M.J.) by telling me that if he wasn’t playing hockey, he would probably be a teacher. Why don’t you just go end genocide in Darfur while you’re at it, Adam.
- Oh, Crunchy. How I love you so. (I think they used the exact same interests/hobbies thing from last year, which makes me think they are slackers. I have also been operating under the assumption that since Rachel McAdams is his favorite actress, he will watch The Notebook with me whenever I want and come with me to see The Time-Traveler’s Wife. Especially since according to Drew Stafford, guys actually like chick flicks.)
- I love how Petey listed his brother as one of the most influential people in his life, since here at Frostee’s House we LOVE Geoff. He’s basically awesome.
- Pommer’s favorite team growing up was the Green Bay Packers (if it turns out he is one of those Brett Favre fan boys, I am taking his picture off The Wall), and the best concert he ever went to was Justin Timberlake (first of all, I thought Kanye was his favorite! And second, according to my friend Erin, who ran into him at that very same concert, he claims “Soupy had an extra ticket and made me come!” The poor dear.)
- Craig Rivet’s biggest pet peeves are cockiness and arrogance, but I really don’t care what he has to say because he doesn’t even wanna be in Buffalo. If his play shows that, I will have to burn down his house.
- We’ve already figured out that Derek Roy loves his boat, “Love Potion #9″ (I’m going along with the theory that Petey named it. It seems like something he would do), but did you know that he also likes playing cards and vids? Derek Roy is a gamer. Who’da thunk?
- Staffy is smiling as well. I’m not sure if I like the new, happy versions of Drew Stafford and Tim Connolly. Zach Parise is his favorite athlete (awww!!!) and he collects arcade games (hmmm). And what the hell is up with D-Money?
- Henrik Tallinder, call me sometime and we’ll watch Shrek. (Shrek, man? Shrek? That’s amazing.) And is it just me, or is saying that he’d be a ski instructor if he wasn’t a hockey player very Swedish of him?
- Whoever cut Thomas Vanek’s hair should be killed. Is he harboring some sort of secret desire to look like his little froufrou dog? (Frostee’s Dad literally choked on his drink when I told him this. We have a yellow lab, after all, and he very much dislikes small dogs)
- If someone finds me a picture of “Webs” boating with Derek Roy, I think I will die laughing.
- Not only is my BFF Gerb-dogg rocking a soulpatch, he also looks incredibly cuddly. If I ever meet him, I think I will have to cuddle with him (in a totally friendly way).
While I love each and every one of my dear readers equally, one particular reader went above and beyond the call of duty yesterday, and she is going to be recognized for that now. Twihard and I have actually known each other for a while; she was even one of the people I was IMing when I started this little project. While Twihard is a wonderful, wonderful girl, she doesn’t know that much about hockey. That didn’t stop her from sitting down in front of her computer last night and reading every single post from July up until yesterday. That takes some serious dedication, so for that, I present Twihard with the first ever Reader Award! Woo! *clapclapclap*
And of course, Twi, you will be always welcome in the Latin Lovers club. You should even be made an officer, since Mrs. Curran still doesn’t know your name. But she doesn’t know my name either. Or Camille’s. Or Damien’s.
I find myself in a strange situation, Dear Readers. I rode the bus home today because I didn’t have any after school activities, and then when I got home I sat around for an hour reading my new issue of Seventeen Magazine. Then I leisurely did my French homework and half of my review packet, glanced over my notes for the quiz tomorrow, and filled out the parent schedule for Open House on Thursday. Then I was done. I had no other hoomework to do. at four o’clock on a Tuesday afternoon I was done with all of my homework. I could not believe it. I went on the computer, as I am wont to do after I finish my homework, but I was confused, as I usually don’t have time to just waste away on the World Wide Web until after dinner. I checked up on all my must-reads, and added a new one to the list. I highly recommend Tim Kennedy’s blog. It may not be as good as Crunchy’s but it’s pretty darn close.
I finished all this, Dear Readers, downloaded a few more songs, udated my AIM profile, and found myself staring at the clock, which read five. I was then faced with a difficult decision. Do I continue working on my global scrapbook, so that I’m not scrambling at the last minute? Or do I start talking about the players and the upcoming season? (It’s not like my analysis is going to be all that professional) After carefully contemplating this, I decided that I can actually have the best of both worlds! (Go die, Hanna Montana) I’ll just preview the forwards today, and then I can do some more research afterwards! Aren’t I so smart? (Don’t answer that)
Now, just remember that this is the first time I’m doing more than verbally talking about the players (“Yeah, well, Vanek sucked ASS last year and better make up for it. And I swear to God, if Miller let’s in one more soft goal, I’m having him freaking KILLED”). It’ll be a work in progress, and it might not be all that statbitty, but hopefully it won’t suck too bad!
The 2008-09 Buffalo Sabres (courtesy of that sexy depth chart on Sabres.com)
Last season was: obnoxious.
This season should be: goal-filled.
Last season Thomas Vanek was feeling the stress of being a new father and having a $50 million contract on his head. While the second half of the year gave us reason to hope, the first half of the year was TERRIBLE. He needs to stop trying to be something he’s not. Thomas Vanek is a scorer, and once he gets that through his thick skull, he should be okay.
But I still haven’t forgiven him for ratting me out about my run-in with Stanley. (But it was accidental! And up close, Lord Stanley is one sexy beast.)
Last season was: one of the sole reasons I didn’t commit suicide.
This season should be: just as awesome as last year.
I was not exaggerating above. Every time I was sitting on the coach threatening to slit my wrists over the Sabres’ crappy play, Dan would go score a goal or do something awesome. And then he signed an extension, and he’s even getting married next year (although whether or not the man-child bagged a real chick or his Hanna Montana doll [go die, Hanna Montana] is up for debate), so I’m really feeling the Dan Paille Love.
Last season was: a thoroughly enjoyable experience.
This season should be: a thoroughly enjoyable experience.
I really do love Patrick Kaleta. If he makes the roster this year, he is SO Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend for the ’09-10 season. He has already won that competition. I mean, he still lives at home, he has scored a goal and assisted on a Petey goal (after my parents got home from that game, the very first thing my dad said was, “That should go on a plaque. A Peters goal with assists from Kaleta and Mair.”), his first fight was with Sean Avery, and he is one hell of a hitter. What’s not to love, I ask you?
Last season was: a pleasant surprise.
This season should be: hilarious kickass.
Derek Roy was another one of those bright spots. I mean, he somehow managed to score 32 goals, and some people are even saying the contract he signed last year is starting to look like a bargain. That’s pretty cool. As long as he works on the diving, and keeps up the momentum from a stellar second half of last season, he and Love Potion #9 should be sailing off into clear skies.
Last season was: steady and reliable.
This season should be: steady and reliable.
Jochen Hecht is quite possibly the ONLY player on this entire freaking team I can count on 24/7. If he keeps it up, there will be no Jochen-bashing on this blog.
Last season was: like Goldilocks’s porridge.
This season should be: like Goldilocks’s porridge.
Paul Gaustad isn’t a flashy player. He doesn’t score lots of goals, and he doesn’t get thrown out of the game during his first shift (but I still love you, Petey! Honest!) Goose was taken in like the seventh round, and had no business even getting into the NHL, yet here he is. And after that whole contract extension over the summer, I think he’s going to be sticking around for a while.
Don’t forget he also proves that green is sexy, and he’s even first runner-up in the Frostee’s Sabres Boyfriend competition. He knows that if Crunchy starts sucking, he’s my man.
Last season was: um…it’s Adam Mair.
This season should be: um…it’s Adam Mair.
I’ll be perfectly honest with you: I don’t pay all that much attention to Adam Mair. I’m sorry. I get that he’s wonderful and helps animals and all that shit, but when it comes to his on-ice performance, I get too distracted bashing other players to worry about him. But I do love how he has taken it upon himself to protect Patty Kaleta. I think that’s adorable.
I’m in to adorable, in case you hadn’t figured that out by now.
Last season was: nonexistent. Did he even play a game?
This season should be: less injury-plauged? IDK. At this point it seems like he can only go up.
Tim Connolly is supposedly a very good hockey player. That’s what lots of people say. I actually can not remember a time in recent memory when he did play. He could take the ice against the Habs and turn over the puck for every single one of their goals, and it’ll seem like an improvement because at least he’s THERE.
But I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that some of the guys don’t want him back in the dressing room showering with them, because they’re all so afraid they’ll catch something.
Last season was: comme ci comme ca
This season should be: spent out of Lindy’s doghouse.
I vaguely remember hearing about some sort of spat Lindy and Staffy had right before the last game that caused Staffy to be benched. I do not remember details, since I didn’t watch that game. I was babysitting that night, and let the little monsters angels play amongst themselves while I watched the Caps win the Southeast Division on Center Ice. (Before the game when they showed the dressing room and Ovie didn’t have his shirt on, I screamed really loudly, and the kids thought it was the WEIRDEST thing that I was happy to see him without his shirt on. I was like, “Children, you have no idea.”) It was actually kind of awesome. That game was SO COOL, and Ovie was awesome, and the whole team was awesome, and his postgame interview was awesome, but back to the Sabres.
So, if Lindy and Staffy do intead have some sort of issue with each other, I suggest they get it taken care of during training camp so Drew can go back to drinking the blood of virgins. As we all learned from Thomas Vanek, life is Ruff when you’re not on Lindy’s side.
Last season was: cute and cuddly and adorable and OUTRAGEOUSLY KICKASS.
This season should be: not the last one he spends in Buffalo.
Word on the street is that Pommer and his agent have called Friday their deadline for a contract extension, but I refuse to believe that until there is a nice, long contract with his Johnny Hancock on it. I will then proceed to pommerdoodle my heart out.
I have no complaints about his season. He was pretty rad out there.
Last season was: a bit of a rollar coaster, in my professional opinion.
This season should be: a bit less of a roller coaster.
Ales Kotalik is another one of those players I don’t pay that much attention to. I remember him being pretty good in shootouts (specifically the Winter Classic), but I also have this nagging suspicion that he had a few sucky shifts too. I’m not 100%. I should probably pay more attention to each and every player on the team, not just the ones I love/hate.
Last season was: one of the reasons why I wanted to slit my wrists.
This season should be: short for Max the Sabre. Trade him already, Darcy!
Max Afinogenov sucks. He sucks more than I can remember anyone sucking in a really long time. He sucks so much they wouldn’t even let him join the sucky club. He sucks so much that Adolf Hitler took one look at him and went, “You suck.”
But in all seriousness, if no one else will even trade for him, you know it’s bad. I realize that there is an actual chance that Darcy will be able to trade him for a coupon on the Wendy’s dollar menu and then he’ll go on to score 40 goals and lead his new team to the Conference finals, but I really don’t care. Every time he touched the ice, I reached for a knife. When he kept hurting his groin, I cheered. He is not good for my mental (and physical) health. He needs to go away.
Last season was: AHAHAHAAHA.
This season should be: AHAHAHAA.
I love Andrew Peters. I could never love him the way Corinne does, but it’s awfully close. Andrew always makes me laugh. I never even bother with expectations for him. Two goals this year, Mr. Peters. Let’s try for two.
Although I did hear that he might be one of those guys fighting for a roster spot. I honestly can’t imagine a Sabres roster without Andrew Peters. It would be like Thanksgiving without turkey.
And I also have been walking around under the assumption that Andrew Peters (why do I keep calling him by his full name?) thinks he’s my favorite player. I liked to think that Petey Sr. called Petey Jr. and told him how I supposedly love him like I love no other Sabre. I think it’s kinda funny, actually.
Last season was: college hockey, but pretty bitchin’
This season should be: maybe Rochester Portland, hopefully B-lo, but pretty bitchin’
I get that he wasn’t on the depth chart, but as his facebook friend I feel it is my job to talk about how AWESOME he is. Aren’t I such a good BFF? I always make my boyy sound rad.
(shut up. he is, and always shall be, an honorary Sabre)
Last season was: beyond words, bitches.
This season should be: beyond words, bitches.
65 goals. The Hart, Pearsen, Art Ross, and Maurice Richard trophies. Southeast Division champs. A fashion line, and a role in a music video.
Alexander Mikhailovich Ovechkin is here to stay.
P.S. LOADS of warm fuzzies to whomever designed the depth chart. That thing is awesome!
I wandered over to the Sabres website today, as I do every day, to see if Pommer had finally stopped fucking around and signed an extension. Instead, I saw a video. And not just any video. A video about Jason Pominville at the circus*.
I know, right? He went to the circus!! But it gets better, Dear Readers.
Adam Mair was with him. Adam Mair, who always watches out for the wittle boys on the team. How cute is that!!! I bet Jason begged for cotton candy and held Adam’s hand when the clowns went by. Clowns are scary, man.
*Techincally it was Cirque Du Soleil, but it was still a circus. Oh, Jason Pominville.