If I was, I would probably have to murder Rian Lindell. (Seriously, dude? Seriously???)
And just for the record, I’m sure Trent doesn’t have a “groin injury.” He probably has “sucky play-itis.” But the hobo wasn’t any better, as far as I could tell. (But not that I was paying close attention or anything. I’m not a fan, remember?)
Good thing I had a truly sad yet hopeful story about a girl soldier in Cambodia to distract myself. (First They Killed My Father, by Loung Ung. Tragic, but a great read.)
Oh, but, what’s up with those white gloves Hank Lundqvist wears under his regular gloves? I was watching the Rangers at commercials and when he got pulled and took off his gloves, he had those hand-warmer type things on. Is he OCD and has to wear them? Because learning that Henrik Lundqvist is OCD would most likely only make me love him more.
Well. The Sabres actually looked pretty good most of the time last night, but they still lost. Rats. That would have been HUGE if they had beat all three “elite teams of the East” in four nights. A few positives we can take away from the game:
- Thomas Vanek scored twice, proving that he is, in fact, a BAMF
- Not related to the Sabres game, but at one of the intermissions for the LA/Chicago game yesterday afternoon, we were treated to this FABULOUS video on Pkane and how amazing it is. It was complete with baby pictures, footage of him in his bedroom talking about hockey, and him playing some cute little game with his sisters in their driveway. It. Was. AMAZING.
- Lala was pretty solid, which was a relief to see. I was starting to get really worried about him.
- They managed to kill off full two minutes of a 5-on-3, and Rivet and Lydman did some sexy shot blocking.
- They booed Rivet. This may sound kind of crazy, but I was starting to get worried that our team sucked so much that we didn’t have anyone for other teams to boo at. It was nice seeing that we have someone worth booing.
- Pkaleta is still walking around in one piece.
Just one question: Has Tim Connolly officially dropped off the face of the Earth? Because last night when we were checking line combinations at the bottom of the screen, Timmy wasn’t on the scratched list and he wasn’t in the lineup either, and then this morning they didn’t mention him once in the paper. Has he disappeared for good?
Um, yes, the Capitals lost. And I want to apologize to any Caps fans who might be reading this blog, because it’s partly my fault. With the Caps game and the Sabres game starting at the same time, I wasn’t able to watch too much of the Capitals so Alex wasn’t able to score. He only scores when I’m watching.
(But near the beginning of the first period during a stoppage in play, they showed Bruce on the bench and he was kind of dancing around to the beat of the music they were playing in the arena, which confirmed that Bruce is hilarious and the second coolest coach ever [Lindy Ruff will always be the coolest coach in my heart] and that we love him.)
Okay, so last night in the second period of the Caps game (I’m pretty sure it was the second. It might have been the first), one of the only parts I got to watch was when the Caps were on the penalty kill. Alex got a semi-breakaway and was roaring down the ice when some defender came out of nowhere and got in front of him. Did this stop Alex? No. He used the toe of his skate to flip the puck over the guy in front of him and then got off a backhand shot. It was kind of incredible. All, “oh my God he doesn’t have his shirt on!” and squealing about his awesome personality aside, I really do love Alex Ovechkin because he happens to be one hell of a hockey player. He transcends on the ice. I’ll watch him at stoppages in play just because he’s that good. All those obnoxious fans who walk around saying that not only is he not the best player in the league right now, but he’s not even in the top five have obviously never seen him play. He does things with the puck that I didn’t even think could be done.
PAUL GAUSTAD, ILY!!!
Paul Gaustad’s grandfather, you are hilarious and adorable and an awesome grandfather.
Referees, I hope you burn in hell.
Sidney Crosby, I would like you to stick that in your juicebox and suck it.
Ryan Miller, you are an awesome boyfriend and I love you.
Evgeni Malkin, just like my Search Engine Terms say, you are a retard.
Craig Rivet, in the first period when Talbot hit you and you went to the bench, we all kind of thought it looked like you were masturbating. I’m really sorry, but it’s true.
Bulls, I’m mad at you for making me sit out in the freezing cold for three quarters and then starting to score right after I leave and then losing.
Charles Dickens, I’m mad at you for writing Great Expectations.
Drew Stafford, I still think you’re kind of scary.
Max, someone must have told you this is a contract year.
Dear Readers, Alex Ovechkin has ONCE AGAIN proven his UNDYING LOVE for me by scoring his goal WHILE I WAS WATCHING. And while his interview is adorable when he explains how important it was to get Jokey Jose the shutout (I didn’t even know he did shutouts. He doesn’t really seem like the type), I’m mad that he has his freaking under-armor on.
Pkaleta, my parents made a mean comment about how it actually makes sense that I would find you attractive since I do, after all, “have a thing for Ovechkin,” but I want you to know that that comment, combined with your new reputation, does not make me love you any less.
Thomas Vanek, you need to start scoring again.
Buffalo Sabres, I love you all very, very much.
I ate my body weight in sweet potatoes and mashed potatoes last night, and then I added two huge pieces of turkey, some stuffing, coleslaw, a slice of pumpkin role, and a bite of a fantastic apple pie. Then I played an intense game of Balderdash (Much like the Buffalo Sabres, I started out hot then fell in a rut, but still managed to finish in second. Hopefully the Sabres will be able to make a comeback too, and won’t end up like my brother, who got two points all night). After that, I spent about an hour complaining about how full I was and how I was never going to eat again, but now I’m kind of hungry. Is it time for the turkey sandwiches yet?
I don’t really want to bring the mood down, because I actually am excited for the Bulls game today, but I could be in D.C. getting ready to go to the Caps game. Just thought I’d mention that.
While Patty’s house sounds like the most fun place to be on Thanksgiving (doesn’t he seem like a fun guy to just watch hockey with?), I would probally choose Jaro’s just so I could hear him talk. Can’t you imagine him discussing his concern over drying the turkey out in that voice? I would probably die.
If I don’t talk to you guys before tonight, go Sabres! I’m so glad TV will be playing. I was very worried.
P.S. Whoever found this blog searching “evgeni malkin retard” is my hero.
- My amazing family and friends.
- The Sabres finally getting a win. Good God. It’s about time.
- My beloved Alex Ovechkin not only scoring a hat trick, but scoring every single goal while I was watching. He SO loves me.
- The Caps may not have taken my advice, but at least Alex had an awesome hat on in his interview.
- Even if the Sabres had lost last night, I still would have had this gem, courtesy of a text message from my dad: ”we’re in the loser section in the arena. the guy in front of me just asked why they would make tim connolly a healthy scratch.” I never thought I would ever hear “Tim Connolly” and “healthy scratch” in the same sentence. (Apparently during the third period, the same guy asked his friend if he was the general manager and was given the chance, would he trade Thomas Vanek for Patrick Kane? His friend replied that he absolutely would in a heartbeat.)
- The coozies they were giving out at the game, because they are adorable. We named ours Petey and Patty.
- Thomas Vanek not being hurt enough to miss the third period. Let me tell you, there was some serious panic at TFF Headquarters before he showed back up on the bench.
- My Dear Readers, and all the other writers in the hockey blogosphere. Seriously, you guys are amazing.
- Getting to look over during the third period of the game last night and seeing that not only were both my mother and my dog asleep on the couch, but Kieffer, the dog, had fallen asleep with his head on my mom’s lap. It was adorable.
- My dad just calling in from the kitchen: “Do you think Derek Roy is dining at the Peters’ house tonight?”
- My bobbleheads. They wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving, and hope you enjoy your turkey.
- The huge bottle of hand lotion I have in my bathroom. It’s a life saver.
- Facebook Bumper Stickers. I don’t know what I would do without those when it came time to write papers.
- The balloons in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.
- The fact that even though we are celebrating a day of mass genocide, we still enjoys ourselves.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
1. The hockey game tonight is against Boston, and as I’ve said before, I hate seeing Boston. I don’t really feel like slowly killing my soul right before Thanksgiving.
2. Ben may be going tonight, but I get to go on the 12th against Toronto because he has a concert for school, I will most likely be able to go on the 30th – wait, what team was it, again? Don’t they have a player that I kind of like? Hmm – because our mafia connections are apparently going to pull through, and I’ll be going in February against Anaheim because not letting me, of all people, go to a hockey game on my birthday is just cruel.
3. I’m kind of tired, and I’m looking forward to bumming around in my pajamas tonight and screaming at the TV.
- Dear S.L. Price, Dude, you couldn’t be more right! Because all joking and “oh my God his chest is a work of art”-related squealing aside, this is why I love him. This explains it perfectly. With Love, Frostee. (But I would absolutely dispute your decision if it meant he would show up on my front step. Eeee! Can you imagine!)
- Good grief.
- I can not believe Spencer and Heidi eloped. LAME! (Just for the record, I have never watched an episode of The Hills before in my life and don’t plan too. I’m just a religious reader of Us Weekly who happens to find Speidi, especially Spencer, repulsive.)
- When I first heard that Pie was scratched tonight, I got all freaked out and starting whining that Drew Stafford, my new Facebook friend, should have been scratched. But then I saw that he was sick, so while I hope he feels better soon, it’s not as bad.
- Scene: Frostee walks into the kitchen after getting off the bus. Frostee: Hey, everyone. Frostee’s Dad: Your secret boyfriend is out for at least three weeks with an arm injury! Frostee: No! Chrissy!
- I have to read Great Expectations this weekend. Eh.
Dear Washington Capitals,
As you know, last night’s game was very exciting down the stretch. The score was 4-0 Minnesota at the start of the third, but you somehow managed to make it 4-3 with just a few minutes left. (But don’t think I don’t realize that you waited until I got all warm and cozy in my bed to score all the goals and pull me from the edges of sleep to watch you.) While there were a few questionable plays (Since I was doing homework/watching One Tree Hill [OH MY GOD. IF PEYTON DIES FROM CANCER, I WILL KILL MYSELF], the two that really stick out in my mind are Nick Backstrom missing Alex’s stick in the first and everyone leaving Cluttberbuck alone with the puck in front of Jokey Theodore for one of the goals. (Brashear, if you are going to be our favorite goon in the league, you need to be a little smarter out there. And you need to remember not to tell Petey.) However, when it came close to the end of the game, several of your players worked hard to make it a close game. Nick Backstrom scored on Nick Backstrom, which was tres cute, and Bradley scored, but one other player happened to score. You’ve got this one guy on the team, Ovechkin? Maybe you’ve heard of him? He’s pretty good, actually. Heck, Versus’s new hooker ice-level reporter even interviewed him before the game! (And I may or may not have rewound to watch the interview again at the commercial break.) The interview was definitely a hard-hitting piece of visual journalism, and all present at TFF Headquarters (read: Frostee’s mom) were genuinely amazed at how much better his English has gotten.
While the you may have lost the game, the team managed to fight hard, thanks in part to this player I’ve been talking about. Therefore, when I saw the clock run down and stumbled back to bed, I consoled myself with the thought that today I could come home from school, load the internet, and watch a lovely interview of this Ovechkin player. Without his shirt.
You can imagine my disappointment when I clicked on the video link and saw this. Under-armor? Seriously, Capitals? I’ve really come to expect better from you. Sure, this is a nice interview, and Alex eloquently discusses the game, but still. He has his shirt on, and as I’ve said before: fans like seeing players without their shirts on, especially after a tough loss. After the next few games, I expect a return to the glory days of no shirts. Any less, and I will be severely disappointed.
Best Wishes and Good Luck in the Future,
P.S. You may have screwed up the actual video, but nice job captioning it! I thoroughly enjoyed seeing that.
School Island has become my worst enemy. If I had to choose between Chris Neil and School Island, I would choose Chris Neil.
You know, the more I think about Crunchy’s blog the more I realize that it’s adorable. It enforces what my dad’s assistant told me, which is that he’s a really nice, cool guy. I love Crunchy, Dear Readers. He may be sucking right now, but he’s my favorite player, and that counts for a lot.
That’s one of the great things about having a favorite player. Even if they’re playing terribly, you can always find something good about it. You get excited when you see them play really well, and it’s nice to have a player to believe in.
Don’t really know where I’m going with this, so I think I’ll just end with a few pictures.
OMG OMG OMG IT’S MY TWO FAVORITE PLAYERS TOGETHER!!
Heh. This is what happens when the Sabres don’t play.
It figures that right after I resign from the BBFA, the Bills win. And it figures that they score 54 points while I’m seeing Twilight. You know what, Dear Readers? I may be a critical person in general, and I may be risking my life by saying this, but Twilight wasn’t very good. None of the vampires could act, and they were all kind ugly. And they had WAY too much makeup on. *sigh* Oh well. I knew from the beginning that casting Rob Pattinson as Edward was a bad idea, but no one listened to me.
Crunchy updated his blog, guys. Is it just me, or does he use “…” a lot? Like, even more than I do…
And, um, I thought it was totally cute when he said “High school flashbacks…yup, I am getting old.” NO WORRIES, CRUNCHY! I’ll stop complaining about school to you on the phone, if it’s making you feel old! (And you’re still not too old for me. Chris Clark is even older than you and he was all “I’m gonna check Frostee out in front of her father because she. is. awesome.”)
I’ve decided to make up with Crunchy. Obviously our “break” didn’t really do anything spectacular, since they lost to the Islanders. (It does not matter that he wasn’t even in net. He should have yelled at the rest of the team or something)
This is so weird. I have no idea what to do. My life has turned into doing homework, going to school, and watching hockey, and since there is currently no hockey on and I finished my homework, I’m completely lost. I’m like the people in those commercials who have to relearn how to do things after they quit smoking.
Tim Connolly has a broken rib? Wow. I’ll be honest, I never saw that one coming.
And I’m more than a little disappointed that the Caps lost last night. I only stayed up to watch the first period, because I figured that the chances of coming back from a 3-0 deficit against the best team in the NHL were slim.
But, um, I thoroughly enjoyed spending 45 minutes lying on the couch listening to the announcers talk about how amazing Alex is, and showing montages of him, and seeing him walk into the building. (And the hat! I love the hat!)
Now I’m going to see Twilight with Twihard. It should be interesting, because one girl in my French class told me that the screenwriters made it their own but it was still good, 95% of my Facebook newsfeed declares it the best movie in the history of the world, and my friend Gena said she was just glad she had her boyfriend at the theatre to distract her.